7 Toothless wakes up

7. TOOTHLESS WAKES UP Toothless woke up about three weeks later. Fishlegs and Hiccup were at Hiccup's house. Everybody else was out, so Hiccup decided to take the opportunity to check on Toothless's basket. He pulled it out from under the bed. A thin plume of bluey-grey smoke was drifting out from under the lid. Fishlegs whistled. 'He's awake all right,' said Fishlegs. 'Here we go.' Hiccup opened the basket. The smoke billowed out and made Hiccup and Fishlegs cough. Hiccup fanned it away. Once his eyes had stopped watering he could make out a very small, ordinary dragon looking up at him with enormous, innocent, grass-green eyes. 'Hello, Toothless said Hiccup, in what he hoped was a good accent in Dragonese. 'What are you doing?' asked Fishlegs curiously. Dragonese is punctuated by shrill shrieks and popping noises and sounds MOST extraordinary when spoken by a human. This should, of course, read 'Howdeedoodeethere, Toothless,' but I have translated it into English for the benefit of those readers whose Dragonese is a bit rusty. Please read Hiccup's book, Learning to Speak Dragonese, for a crash course in this fascinating language.

~LEARNING TO SPEAK DRAGONESE~ Introduction In order to train your dragon without using the traditional methods of yelling at it, you must first learn to speak Dragonese. Dragons are the only other creatures who speak a language as complicated and sophisticated as humans. Here are some common dragon phrases to get you started: Nee-ah crappa inna di hoosus, pishyou. No poo-ing inside the house, please. Mi Mama no likeit yum-yum on di bum. My mother does not like to be bitten on the bottom. Pishyou keendlee gobba oot mi freeundlee? Please would you be so kind as to spit my friend out? Doit wummortime. Let's try that again.

'Just talking to it,' mumbled Hiccup, very embarrassed. 'Just talking to it???' gasped Fishlegs, in astonishment. 'What do you mean, you're talking to it? You can't talk to it, it's an ANIMAL, for Thor's sake!' 'Oh shut up, Fishlegs,' said Hiccup, impatiently, 'you're frightening it.' Toothless huffed and puffed and blew out some smoke rings. He inflated his neck to make himself look bigger, which is something dragons do when they are scared or angry. Eventually he got up the courage to unfurl his wings and flap up on to Hiccup's arm. He walked his way up on to Hiccup's shoulder and Hiccup turned his face towards him. Toothless pressed his forehead on to Hiccup's forehead and gazed deeply and solemnly into Hiccup's eyes. They stayed there, snout to nose, without moving, for about sixty seconds. Hiccup had to blink a lot because the gaze of a dragon is hypnotic and gives the unnerving feeling that it is sucking your soul away. Hiccup was just thinking, 'Wow, this is amazing– I'm really making contact here!' when Toothless bent down and bit him on the arm.

Hiccup let out a yelp and threw Toothless off him. 'F-f-fish,' hissed Toothless, hovering in the air in front of Hiccup. 'W-w-w-want fish NOW!' 'I haven't got any fish,' said Hiccup in Dragonese, rubbing his arm. Luckily Toothless didn't have any teeth but dragons have powerful jaws so it was still painful. Toothless bit him on the other arm. 'F-F-F-FISH!' said Toothless again. 'Are you OK?' asked Fishlegs. 'I can't believe I'm asking this, but what's he saying?' 'He wants to eat,' replied Hiccup, grimly rubbing both arms. He tried to make his voice sound firm but pleasant; to dominate the creature by the sheer force of his personality, as Gobber had said. 'But WE HAVE NO FISH.' 'OK then,' said Toothless. 'Eat c-c-cat.' He made a lunge for Fiddlesticks, who streaked up the nearest wall with a yowl of terror. Hiccup just managed to grab Toothless by the

tail as he flew off in pursuit. The dragon struggled wildly, shouting 'WANT F-F-FISH NOW! WANT F-F-FOOD NOW! CATS ARE YUMMY WANT FOOD NOW!' 'We don't HAVE any fish,' repeated Hiccup, from between gritted teeth, feeling all his calmness deserting him, 'and you can't eat the cat– I like him.' Fiddlesticks mewed indignantly from a beam high up in the roof. They put Toothless in Stoick's bedroom, where there was a mouse problem. For a while he was happy swooping after the desperately squeaking mice, but then he got bored and started attacking the mattress. 'STOP!' yelled Hiccup, as feathers flew in all directions. Toothless replied by sicking up the remains of a recently deceased mouse right in the middle of Stoick's pillow. 'Aaaargh!' said Hiccup. 'AAAAAAARGH!' said Stoick the Vast, who entered the room at that very moment.

Toothless launched himself at Stoick the Vast's beard, which he mistook for a chicken. 'Get him off!' said Stoick. 'He doesn't do what I say,' said Hiccup. 'Yell VERY LOUDLY at him,' Stoick shouted, VERY LOUDLY. Hiccup yelled as loudly as he could. 'Please will you stop eating my father's beard?' As Hiccup had suspected, Toothless took absolutely no notice whatsoever. I KNEW I'd be useless at yelling, thought Hiccup gloomily. 'DROPTOTHEFLOORYOUORRRIBLELITTLEREPTILE!' yelled Stoick. Toothless dropped to the floor. 'You see?' said Stoick. 'That's how to deal with dragons.' Newtsbreath and Hookfang, Stoick's hunting dragons, came padding into the room. Toothless stiffened as they paced around him, their yellow eyes glinting evily. Each was about the size of a leopard, and they were as delighted by his arrival as a couple of giant cats might be by that of a cute little kitten. 'Greetings, fellow firebreather,' hissed