28 The Party Pooper

The Party Pooper Party! Not party-warty—PARTY!" roared the beast, severely disappointed to have its entrance spoiled by such a stupid slip of the tongues. "I hope you don't mind me crashing the PARTY." The beast cast its eyes around the room. The neighbors were clearly unsettled by the explosive entrance, but they weren't looking at

派对便便派对！“不是派对——派对！”那头野兽吼道，被这样愚蠢的口误破坏了入口，感到非常失望。 “我希望你不介意我闯进晚会。” 那野兽环视了一下房间。 邻居们显然对爆炸的入口感到不安，但他们没有看

the beast with quite the same level of horrified fear that it had grown to expect. In fact, the beast could have sworn that there were looks of concern in their eyes. It realized it was still wearing the stupid dog costume. It pulled down the hood and wiggled its fingers to shred it to pieces. "Are you all right, beast?" asked a small, warbly voice, belonging to the kindly old lady. "Have you just given yourself a shave?" "'All right' isn't the word!" boomed the beast into its megaphone. It raised its free tiny hand triumphantly into the air. "I am majestic! I am splendid! I am the most extraordinary being to ever set foot on this pathetic little earthy-werthy! EARTH, I MEAN EARTH!" "That is the most splendiferous of news," said Eduardo, thrilled to have an opportunity

这只野兽的恐惧程度和它已经预料到的一样。 事实上，野兽可以发誓，他们的眼睛里有关心的表情。 它意识到自己还穿着那套愚蠢的狗服。 它拉下引擎盖，扭动着手指，想把它撕成碎片。 “你还好吗，小畜生？”一个细小的声音问，是慈祥的老妇人的声音。 “你刚刚刮了脸吗？”“‘好’这个词不合适！”那头野兽对着扩音器大声说。 它胜利地向空中举起了那只自由的小手。 “我是威严的！”我太棒了！我是踏上这片可怜的土地上最不平凡的人！地球，我是说地球！”“这是最美妙的消息，”爱德华多说，很高兴有机会

to use the word he had learned from that day's loo paper. "Bethany was sayin' summat about having killed you," said the bird-keeper. "And we were so worried. It must have been another of her jokes no one gets. She used to think it funny to swap my bird feed with farting candy—strange kid." The bird-keeper and some of the others in the room frowned at Bethany, hardly able to believe that she was capable of joking about something as unfunny as the death of the beast. However, Geoffrey beamed with delight. The "joke" explanation made perfect sense to him. "Have you come to help us, beast?" asked Dr. Barnacle, wincing with pain from the arm-

这个词是他从那天的厕纸上学来的。 “宝芬妮说了些什么杀了你的话，”养鸟人说。 “我们非常担心。这肯定是她又一个没人懂的笑话。 她以前觉得把我的鸟饲料和一个会放屁的奇怪的孩子交换很有趣。” 鸟饲养员和房间里的其他一些人对伯大尼皱起了眉头，简直不敢相信她会拿野兽之死这样无趣的事情开玩笑。 然而，杰弗里高兴地笑了。 这个“玩笑”的解释对他来说非常有意义。 “你是来帮助我们的吗，野兽？” 藤壶，胳膊疼得直哆嗦

breaking bandages. "I think some of your presents are a little out of control." "Please, lovely beast," croaked the lizard lady, as she battled with the scarf. "Help us." Bethany crawled toward a fallen tower of Miss Muddle's sweets, grabbed two creations, and shoved one at Ebenezer. "Help you?" spat the beast. "I am not here to help you. I was the one who got the vomit to misbehave in the first place, you idiots!" Some of the neighbors frowned. Others laughed. "Why are you all looking at me like this?" asked the beast, with a snarly slither. "Have you no sense? Do you have no idea of who I am?" "'Course we know—silly ickle beasty," said Amy Clue, a teddy-bear-carrying toddler from

打破绷带。“我觉得你的一些礼物有点失控了。” “求你了，可爱的野兽，”蜥蜴女士用嘶哑的声音说，她在和围巾搏斗。 “帮助我们。”宝芬妮爬向马德尔小姐的糖果塔，抓了两个，把一个推给了埃比尼泽。 “帮你？”野兽吐唾沫。 “我不是来帮你的。 一开始是我让呕吐物捣蛋的，你们这些白痴！”一些邻居皱起了眉头。 别人笑了。“你们为什么都这样看着我？”野兽问，尖声地滑了一下。 “你没有理智吗？”你不知道我是谁吗？”“我们当然知道，傻孩子，小畜生，”艾米·克鲁伊说，她是一个抱着泰迪熊的小孩

the orphanage. "You's a kind and speshul friend. Nuffin' scary 'bout beasty." The toddler's voice was little, but her words were greeted with gusto by the rest of the neighbors. None of them seemed to be afraid. The beast didn't like it one little bit, because it didn't know how it was supposed to respond. "Nothing scary, eh?" said the beast. "Nothing scary about… THIS?!" The beast wiggled its fingers and set its vomit to work. The giant gnomes bent down and shone their red eyes into the neighbors' faces. The hoatzin's stink-box amplified the bird's odors so the whole shop was filled with a sickening scent. The axe-shaped Frisbees started flying around the room—making everyone duck, out of fear of decapitation.

孤儿院。“你是一个善良而忠诚的朋友。 野兽一点也不可怕。” 小女孩的声音很小，但她的话受到了其他邻居的热烈欢迎。 他们似乎都不害怕。 野兽一点也不喜欢它，因为它不知道它应该如何回应。 “没什么可怕的，嗯？”野兽说。 “这没什么可怕的？！”那畜生扭动着手指，呕吐起来。 巨大的地精们弯下腰，用红眼睛看着邻居们的脸。 hoatzin的臭盒放大了鸟的气味，所以整个商店充满了令人作呕的气味。 斧头形状的飞盘开始在房间里飞来飞去——每个人都躲了起来，因为害怕被斩首。

"This is me—ALL ME!" said the beast, its eyes blazing with fury. "I'm the one who's doing this! Think I'm kind? Think I'm speshul now?" The atmosphere in the room changed immediately. The familiar sound of ear- piercing screams and wide-eyed looks of sheer fear were all on display. The beast smiled, preparing to relish the moment. But for some reason, the sights and sounds didn't bring any joy to its dark soul. There was even a voice in the back of its head saying that what it was doing was totally-wotally wrongsies. The beast looked around the sweetshop for a distraction. It found Bethany and Ebenezer. "Actually—it's not all me," the beast roared into its megaphone. "How can I possibly take

“这是我——全是我！”野兽说，眼睛里闪着怒火。 “是我干的！”你觉得我善良吗？ 你觉得我现在疯了吗？”房间里的气氛立刻变了。 熟悉的刺耳的尖叫声和惊恐的大眼睛都在上演。 野兽笑了，准备享受这一刻。 但出于某种原因，这些景象和声音并没有给它黑暗的灵魂带来任何快乐。 甚至有一个声音在它的后脑勺里说，它所做的完全是错误的。 野兽环顾糖果店四周，想分散注意力。 它找到了宝芬妮和埃比尼泽。 “实际上——不全是我的问题，”野兽对着扩音器吼道。 “我怎么可能拿