19 The Midnight Raid

The Midnight Raid Oopsiekins," said the beast, raising a tiny hand to its mouth. Its eyes returned to normal, and its voice was no longer trembling with rage. "I have no idea where that came from. Maybe I'm allergywergey to cheese sandwiches."

Bethany was furious with how quickly the beast had snapped out of its hangry rage. She had been so awed by its behavior that she hadn't managed to push the button in time. "Oh, don't pretend like you don't know what that was," said Bethany. "It wasn't cheese that made you like that, it was the meat hidden underneath it." "Whaaaaat?" The beast looked genuinely horrified. "You fed me meatsies? Whyever would you do that?" "To save the neighborhood from whatever evil scheme you've got for it," said Bethany. "I knew a taste of meat would bring out the real you." "But that wasn't the real me! The sandwich unleashy-weashed something…" The beast looked at its belly, as if unable to articulate

the horrors dwelling inside it. "Unleashy-weashed something… nastykins." At that moment, Ebenezer came bumbling downstairs with two armfuls of antique silver. Both piles kept wobbling from side to side, but somehow he managed not to drop any of it. "What was that sound?" asked Ebenezer, as he laid the silver in front of the beast. "I could have sworn I heard something." "Your ears must need a licky-wick. No noisies here!" said the beast. It let out a laugh that sounded like a goat farting, followed by a stinky fake yawn. "Oofsies. I'm awfully tiredykins. Time for beddy-byes." "No!" shouted Bethany. "You did hear something. It was the sound of the beast revealing that it's still evil!"

"Oh, Bethany, when are you going to give this up?" asked Ebenezer in exasperation. He turned to the beast. "Don't you want to treat yourself to a nibble of all this silver I've brought you?" "Oh nooosies," said the beast. It climbed into its canoe and wiggled its fingers. "Not hungry anymore." Bethany opened her mouth to try to tell Ebenezer again about what had happened, before realizing that he would never believe her whilst the beast was looking so well- behaved. If she wanted to convince him of the truth, then she'd have to find a way of feeding it again. "Yeah, well, I'm REALLY HUNGRY!" she shouted. "IN FACT, I THINK I'M GOING TO MAKE MYSELF A SANDWICH USING

INGREDIENTS FROM ONE OF THE REALLY MEATY FRIDGES!" The beast paused on the staircase for a moment. Then it whooshed the canoe back up to the attic. "A late-night sandwich, eh?" asked Ebenezer. "Mmm, that does sound rather tasty. Would you mind making me one as well?" Bethany looked at Ebenezer, unable to believe how he was so stupid. "Bog off and make one yourself, Ebenezer. I'm going to bed, and I'm gonna sleep down here," she said. She stomped into the front sitting room and slumped on a sofa. "Are you quite sure, Bethany?" asked Ebenezer. "Shouldn't you try to get the best

sleep possible for this sweetshop thingy tomorrow?" "I'll sleep where I flipping want," said Bethany. "Right—yes, of course," said Ebenezer. He scratched his head. "Um, well, I suppose I'll head up as well. Nighty night!" Bethany responded to the nighty night by blowing a raspberry. She waited until she heard him leave, and then she sat back up again. She had stayed downstairs because she was certain that the beast would make its way back down here to have its wicked way with the meat fridges. She switched off all the lights, so that the beast would think the coast was clear. Now all she had to do was wait.