7 The Snazzy Barnacle

The Snazzy Barnacle Bethany and Ebenezer ran backstage. Claudette lay unconscious behind the curtain, whilst Mr. and Mrs. Cussock peered over her in a questioning manner. Bethany pulled out a catapult from her backpack, loaded it with a rotten tomato, and pointed it at the Cussocks. "Who did this to her?" she asked. "Show yourself, or I will show you the true meaning of pain."

贝瑟妮和埃比尼泽跑到后台。 克劳德特昏迷不醒地躺在帘子后面，卡索克先生和太太用询问的目光打量着她。 宝芬妮从背包里拿出一个弹弓，装上一颗烂番茄，对准库索克一家。 “这是谁干的？”她问。 “展现你自己，否则我就告诉你痛苦的真正含义。”

No one stepped forward. No one was shown the true meaning of pain. "I think she just collapsed," said Ebenezer. "Perhaps it's all part of the performance," suggested Mr. Cussock. "There are many plays where the principal character dies at the end of the show. Although it's a little unusual to see it happening in a singing concert." "More Hurricane! More Hurricane!" roared the remains of the audience on the other side of the curtain. "Should we… oh, I don't know… call someone or something?" asked Mrs. Cussock. Before anyone had time to call someone or something, Claudette woke up. She stumbled to her talons and looked around the stage. Her eyes were filled with fear and uncertainty.

没有人上前。没有人知道痛苦的真正含义。 “我想她只是晕倒了，”埃比尼泽说。 “也许这都是表演的一部分，”库索克说。 “有很多戏剧的主角在剧终时死去。 虽然在演唱会上看到这种事有点不寻常。” “更多的飓风!再来一曲《飓风》！”幕后剩下的观众吼道。 “我们应该……哦，我不知道……打电话给什么人或什么东西吗？”库索克太太问。 大家还没来得及打电话，克劳德特就醒了。 她踉踉跄跄地抬起爪子，环顾了一下舞台。 她的眼睛里充满了恐惧和不确定。

"What happened?" she asked. "Still investigating," said Bethany. She waved her catapult threateningly around the stage. "You fell over. Maybe the encore was too much for you?" said Mr. Cussock. "No, that can't be it. Wintlorian parrots are always ready to sing another song," said Claudette. "Or maybe you haven't had enough to eat?" suggested Ebenezer. Hope flittered into Claudette's eyes. "Well, the only thing I've eaten recently is a banana. I flew here straight from the bird-keeper's, and he didn't offer me so much as a worm to eat. Bethany, would you mind awfully if I…?" asked Claudette, looking hopefully at the rotten tomato.

“发生什么事了？”她问。 “还在调查，”宝芬妮说。 她威胁地在舞台上挥舞着弹弓。 “你摔倒了。也许返场对你来说太过分了？”库索克说。 “不，不可能是这样。温特里安的鹦鹉总是准备好再唱一首歌，”克劳德特说。 “也许你还没吃饱？”埃比尼泽建议道。 克劳德特的眼里闪过一丝希望。 “嗯，我最近只吃了一根香蕉。 我从鸟饲养员那里直接飞过来，他连一条虫子都没给我吃。 宝芬妮，你介意我……吗？”克劳德特满怀希望地看着烂番茄问道。

Bethany unloaded the catapult and chucked the tomato in the air. Claudette caught it in her beak and ate it with a single gulp. A little color returned to her pale, purple cheeks. "Can I get you anything else? Water? Bandages? Some ice for your head?" asked Bethany. "Oh, don't worry about that. I'm feeling much better now, I promise," said Claudette. "There's no need to make a fuss." "More Hurricane! More Hurricane!" roared the impatient audience. Claudette hobbled over to the curtain, but Mrs. Cussock held her back. "I don't think you're ready for any more songs," she said. "But there's no one else who can finish the show," said Claudette.

宝芬妮卸下弹弓，把番茄抛向空中。 克劳德特把它叼在嘴里，一口气吃了下去。 她那苍白的、紫色的双颊又恢复了一点血色。 “你还需要点什么吗？” 水吗?绷带吗?“给你的头来点冰吗？”宝芬妮问。 “哦，别担心。 我现在感觉好多了，我保证，”克劳德特说。 “没必要大惊小怪。” “更多的飓风!再来一场飓风！”不耐烦的观众吼道。 克劳德特一瘸一拐地走到窗帘前，但卡索克太太拉住了她。 “我觉得你还没准备好听更多的歌，”她说。 “但是没有其他人能完成这部剧，”克劳德特说。

Right on cue, Gloria made her grand return to the stage, determined to give the small crowd what they didn't want. Bethany and the others heard Gloria clear her throat on the other side of the curtain. "Everyone, I have the most wonderful news!" shouted Gloria in her affected voice. "I have literally just written a brand-new song. It's called… 'Tornado Snacktime'!" "Tornado Snacktime" was a rip-off of "Hurricane Picnic," and not a very good one at that. Gloria screeched and tap-danced her way through the number, causing people to flee for the doors as fast as their legs could carry them. When she finally took her bow, there wasn't a single person left in the audience,

就在这时，格洛丽亚隆重地回到舞台上，决心给那一小群人他们不想要的东西。 宝芬妮和其他人听到格洛丽亚在窗帘的另一边清了清嗓子。 “大家好，我有一个好消息！”格洛丽亚用她做作的声音喊道。 “我刚刚写了一首全新的歌。 它叫……‘龙卷风零食时间’！”“龙卷风零食时间”抄袭了“飓风野餐”，而且做得不太好。 格洛丽亚尖叫着，跳着踢踏舞穿过电话号码，导致人们以最快的速度向门口逃去。 当她最后鞠躬时，观众中一个人也没有留下，

but Gloria didn't notice. She walked through the curtain to join Bethany and the others. "Wasn't that just marvelous?" said Gloria. "Did you see my standing ovation?" "That wasn't a standing ovation. That was people getting up to leave," said Bethany. Gloria gave Bethany a nasty stare. She didn't appreciate negative feedback. "Give me that catapult," said Gloria. "I'm gonna use it as a prop in the next show I put on at the orphanage." "Bog off, bog breath," said Bethany as she grasped the catapult tighter. Gloria Cussock was not used to taking no, or indeed "Bog off, bog breath," for an answer. She put her hands on her hips, bent her knobbly knees, and started scraping her tap shoes along the floor—creating a deeply

但歌洛莉亚没有注意到她穿过帘子走到宝芬妮和其他人身边。 “那不是很了不起吗？”格洛丽亚说。 “你看到我起立鼓掌了吗？”“那不是起立鼓掌。 那是人们起身离开的声音。” 歌洛莉亚恶狠狠地瞪了宝芬妮一眼。 她不喜欢负面的反馈。 “把弹弓给我，”格洛丽亚说。 “下次在孤儿院演出时，我要把它当作道具。” “滚蛋，滚蛋，”宝芬妮一边说一边把弹弓抓得更紧了。 格洛丽亚·库索克不习惯别人说“不”，甚至不习惯别人说“滚蛋，滚蛋”。 她双手叉腰，弯曲她那凹凸有节的膝盖，开始在地板上擦她的踢脚鞋——制造了一个深深的