27 The Caged Beast

The Caged Beast Three days later, Ebenezer and Bethany were standing on the most boring street in the world. It was deliberately boring—designed so that people would walk and drive past it without ever feeling compelled to give it a second glance. Its name was something forgettable like Mill Road or North Street, and the buildings were constantly (and secretly) remodeled so that changing architectural fashions would never make them anything less than "unremarkable." The most interesting thing about the whole place was a puddle. Bethany splashed her sneakers in it whilst Ebenezer rang the

buzzer of the address they'd been given. A few seconds later Mr. Nickle answered through the intercom. "Yes, what—it?" he asked. "Oh hullo, Squee— er. What are you do—ere? How the devil did you find us?" "You invited us—remember? You woke us up in the middle of the night. You said it was important; you said we had to come here first thing," said Ebenezer. "Yeah—and it's a total pain. Some of us still have two and a half chapters of Quantum Mechanics for Morons to read!" shouted Bethany from the puddle. "Did I really?" said Mr. Nickle, thoroughly confused. "Why would I do th—? Are you—?" "Mr. Nickle, we can't hear you very well. It sounds like you're miles away," said Ebenezer.

"Hmm? Oh ye—that's because I prob—ly am. Come join me. P—t on the wellies," said Mr. Nickle. The intercom went dead, and a few moments later two pairs of scarlet Wellington boots were shoved through the mail slot—one set in Ebenezer's size, the other in Bethany's. Ebenezer pushed the intercom again, but there was no response, whilst Bethany ran over and put her boots on. "This'll be much better for splashing!" said Bethany. She ran up to the puddle and jumped into it. But instead of a great big splash, there was nothing. She disappeared inside the puddle, as if she had fallen through the earth. "BETHANY!" shouted Ebenezer. He quickly put on his boots and jumped after her,

even though he had been feeling distinctly uncomfortable around puddles ever since the beast had done its puddling in the theater. He fell through the puddle as well and discovered that it wasn't a puddle at all. It was a portal to an island. He found himself wading in a sea of water toward the island's shore. As he got closer, he saw that the island was dominated by a single building—a fat, high-tech pyramid building, covered with the words D.O.R.R.I.S. HQ— NOTHING TO SEE HERE. Other people and creatures—agents, prisoners, interview suspects—were wading toward the shore from all directions, each of them having been transported to the island from different portals all across the world. Bethany was already on the beach with Mr.

Nickle, trying her very best not to be impressed by the spectacle. Ebenezer quickly ran up the beach toward them. Mr. Nickle was leaning on one of his walking sticks and carrying three helmets under his other arm. "Yeah, you definitely did. You said it was urgent," Bethany was saying whilst Mr. Nickle looked on in confusion. "Was it about the beast? Or Claudette?" "Claudette? Who's—" began Mr. Nickle, but then he remembered. He looked down at the helmets and frowned again. "I don't know why I have these, but we should put them on." The three of them put on their helmets as they walked into the pyramid. The ground- floor lobby was a hotbed of suspicion and mistrust, with agents looking around the

room—all of them silently accusing each other of treachery. Mr. Nickle led them through to the medical bay, where a familiar face was snoozing upon one of the beds. "CLAUDETTE!" said Bethany. She ran over and woke Claudette up with a squeeze. "Oh, hullo, poppet," said Claudette. Her voice was weak, and so was her body. She was hooked up to various beeping machines, and even when she was awake, she seemed in a half-dazed state. "I'm so, so sorry about everything that—" "Nah. Don't you dare say sorry. No one's to blame but the beast," said Bethany. The mention of the beast caused Claudette to wince. "That creature… I saw inside its mind, you know," she said. "The war, Rapscallicus, that