24 The Puddling

The Puddling Who's a clever boy, then?" said the beast, doing its best parrot voice. "Did you really manage to break out of the attic all by yourself? I'm terribly impressed." Ebenezer's voice had been soothed, but the rest of his body was still battered and bruised. As Bethany looked at him, she realized that Ebenezer had never abandoned her—and that it was all another part of the beast's dreadful scheme.

"Run, Ebenezer, it's too late!" she shouted. She couldn't bear to see her third, final, and most important friend killed by the beast. "Don't you dare send my dear boy away," said the beast. "Look at him—he's positively desperate to see his beasty in action. I think he deserves a premier seat." The beast wiggled its fingers and brought the big yellow umbrella hovering over the best seat in the house—which happened to be occupied by Eduardo Barnacle. The beast puddled Eduardo right in between his screaming parents. "There you go, Ebenezer. Would you like me to vomit out a blanket so your bottom doesn't get wet?" said the beast. "Stop it—stop it right now!" said Ebenezer, marching up the aisle.

"Oh deary. First you break out of the attic, and now you think you're some kind of hero, do you? It seems like someone's been reading too many comics," said the beast, with a sad shake of its head. "I must say, I'm rather fascinated to see what you have in mind. Is that man with the walking sticks a part of your plan?" The beast looked behind Ebenezer. The old man was slowly hobbling into the theater, even though Ebenezer had given him explicit instructions to go back to the retirement home with Nurse Mindy. "I haven't come here with a plan. I've come here to offer you a deal," said Ebenezer. "Let's run away from here. You and I—let's go right now."

"What?" said the beast. A smirk broke out across its dribbly lips—causing more feathers to fall from the parroty side of its body. "You want me to throw away all this hard work? Why on earth would I do that?" "Because I'll serve you again." "You'll serve me again whether you like it or not." "No, I mean I'll do it willingly—like the days before the Bethany blip," said Ebenezer. "I know you can get me to do whatever you like either way, by beating and bullying, but wouldn't you rather avoid all that fuss? If you let her go, I promise I will be the best servant you've ever had. I'll bring you your meals, and I won't ask for anything in return. Staff like that is hard to find. It's like you said—

everyone else who served you proved too weak and widdly, m-master." The smirk grew wider. The beast liked hearing the word "master" again. "No, Ebenezer! I'll never let the beast be the boss of you again!" said Bethany. "You don't have a choice in the matter. Please be quiet whilst I speak with my master," said Ebenezer. He returned his attention to the beast. "Think about it. You can't stay here—this show will have attracted too much attention—" "Don't worry about these people. I was planning on puddling them all anyway," said the beast. This remark did not go over well with the audience.

"That seems like a lot of hassle for you," said Ebenezer. "It would be so much easier if we were to leave right now. We could be far away—long before any division even comes near here. It could be a fresh start—wouldn't that be good for us?" "I suppose an attic in a slightly hotter country could be interesting," said the beast. "But I'm not getting it—you wouldn't want anything from me? No new tea sets, no trousers jazzy enough to play the saxophone? What about the magical things you used to demand from me?" "I don't need any of that," said Ebenezer. "Just let Bethany live, and I'll serve you until the end of time." He looked at Bethany, and Bethany looked at him. They had only known each other for a