10 The Unexpected Spot of Do-Gooding

The Unexpected Spot of Do-Gooding Whilst Bethany and Claudette were flying around the neighborhood, Ebenezer was looking at pictures of himself. Specifically, he was looking at pictures of himself with the beast. The first of these images was a portrait of Ebenezer and the beast at the Frost Fair, which had been held on the neighborhood's frozen lake during a particularly cruel winter.

当贝瑟尼和克劳德特在附近飞来飞去的时候，埃比尼泽正在看自己的照片。 具体来说，他在看自己和野兽在一起的照片。 第一张照片是埃比尼泽和野兽在冰霜集市上的肖像，那是在一个特别残酷的冬天，在附近的冰湖上举行的。

Ebenezer was not much older than thirty, and the beast was still small enough to be transported around the place in a basket, with three carefully carved-out eyeholes. In the background, behind one of the ice- skating jesters, Ebenezer could make out the face of Nicholas Nickle the Second. He had been a horrid child who inherited his late father's penchant for making sticks of the excessively pointy variety. The next portrait showed Ebenezer and the beast pouring a chamber pot of pee-pee over the smug, bewigged head of Nicholas Nickle the Eighth. The one after that recalled the occasion, around the time of Nicholas Nickle the Thirteenth, when the beast had reluctantly agreed to waltz with Ebenezer to

埃比尼泽不过三十岁，那头野兽还很小，可以装在篮子里到处搬运，它的眼睛上有三个精心雕刻的洞。 在背景中，在一个滑冰的小丑后面，埃比尼泽认出了尼古拉斯·尼克尔二世的脸。 他是一个可怕的孩子，继承了他已故父亲的嗜好，喜欢做各种特别尖的木棍。 下一幅画是埃比尼泽和那只野兽把尿尿倒在尼古拉斯·尼克尔八世得意洋洋、戴着假发的头上。 之后的一张回忆起在尼古拉斯·尼克尔十三世的时候，那只野兽不情愿地同意和埃比尼泽跳华尔兹

save them both the bother of attending the neighborhood ball. There were portraits of items that the beast had vomited out over the centuries. Many of these had been sold in the sale, but there were some, like the rocket rain boots and the smooth-talking spatulas, that must have still been lurking in one of the house's many hidden spaces. The book was a real page-turner, and it could be read over and over again, because the memories changed every time Ebenezer went back to the beginning. He was so caught up in his own past that he didn't stop to think about what it all meant. But just as he was about to commence his fourth reading, he realized what the memory book was really showing him. It suggested

省得他们俩去参加邻里舞会了。 这里有几个世纪以来野兽呕吐出来的东西的肖像。 这些东西很多都在拍卖中被卖掉了，但也有一些，比如火箭雨靴和口齿伶俐的抹刀，肯定还藏在房子的某个隐蔽空间里。 这本书确实是一本引人入胜的书，可以一遍又一遍地读，因为每次埃比尼泽回到开头，记忆都会发生变化。 他太沉迷于自己的过去，没有停下来思考这一切意味着什么。 但就在他准备开始第四次阅读时，他意识到记忆本真正告诉他的是什么。 它建议

that the person Ebenezer missed most in the world was… the beast. "Oh no," said Ebenezer. Then, just to make his stance perfectly clear, he added, "Oh no, no, no!" He couldn't believe it was possible. It was one thing to think that his life ran a little smoother when he had a magical creature around, but it was something else to be actually missing the slobbery, murderous menace. Reluctantly, Ebenezer closed the book—knowing that he really shouldn't look at it anymore. He took it downstairs and hid it under the sofa in one of the sitting rooms because he wasn't ready to return it to the land of leopard-print waistcoats.

埃比尼泽在这个世界上最想念的人是……那头野兽。 “哦，不，”埃比尼泽说。然后，为了明确自己的立场，他又说：“哦，不，不，不！”他不敢相信这是可能的。 认为身边有一个神奇的生物，他的生活变得更加顺畅是一回事，但真正想念那个流口水、凶残的威胁，又是另一回事了。 埃比尼泽不情愿地合上了书——他知道自己真的不该再看这本书了。 他把它拿到楼下，藏在一间客厅的沙发底下，因为他还没准备好把它放回那个豹纹马甲的国度。

He tried distracting himself by going outside to deal with the beastly items that had been left on the lawn. When he opened the door, he found an extraordinarily old man squinting at the objects. "Can I help?" asked Ebenezer, in a way that really said Get off my lawn, strange old man! He said it again, louder, because he saw that the man's hearing aids were switched off. "Hmm?" said the old man. He was supporting himself with two walking sticks. "Oh, hello there. Can you help me?" "That's literally what I just asked," said Ebenezer testily. The memory book had left him in a thoroughly disagreeable mood. "What are you doing here?" The old man fiddled with his hearing aids. "I'm here for the yard sale," he said in a

他到外面去处理那些留在草坪上的讨厌的东西，试图分散自己的注意力。 当他打开门时，他发现一个非常老的人眯着眼睛看着这些东西。 “我能帮什么忙吗？”埃比尼泽问道，那口气就像是在说：“离开我的草坪，奇怪的老头！”他又说了一遍，声音更大了，因为他看到那个人的助听器被关掉了。 “嗯？”老人说。他用两根手杖支撑着自己。 “哦，你好。你能帮我吗？”“这就是我刚才问的，”埃比尼泽不耐烦地说。 那本记事簿使他心情极不愉快。 “你在这儿干什么？”老人摆弄着他的助听器。 “我来这里是为了旧货出售，”他用一种低沉的声音说

ragged and jangly voice. "Dorris told me there were some wonderful things to be had." "Dorris? Who the heck is Dorris?" said Ebenezer. "The yard sale was yesterday. Done, gone—finito. We sold everything." The old man raised an eyebrow at the objects on the lawn. "You won't want any of those," said Ebenezer. "They've all been causing mischief." The old man's face fell, and Ebenezer felt a surge of pity. Then he had a sudden surge of inspiration, as he remembered Bethany suggesting that he should do a spot of voluwhating at the old people's home. It felt like an opportunity to do something similar had landed, quite literally, on his doorstep.

粗哑刺耳的声音。“多丽丝告诉我有一些美好的东西可以拥有。” “Dorris ?多丽丝到底是谁？”埃比尼泽说。 “庭院拍卖是昨天的事。 完成,gone-finito。我们什么都卖了。” 老人对草坪上的东西扬起了眉毛。 “你不会想要这些的，”埃比尼泽说。 “他们都在搞恶作剧。” 老人的脸沉了下来，埃比尼泽感到一阵怜悯。 这时，他突然灵光一现，因为他想起了宝芬妮曾建议他去敬老院随便说几句。 这感觉就像一个类似的机会降临了，毫不夸张地说，就在他家门口。