20 The Beast and the Bethany

The Beast and the Bethany The beast smashed the door open with the moon-sized bowling ball and used the two-hundred-pound weight and bag of bricks to push the other obstacles to one side. It made the piano play another loud, nasty tune as it waddled into the room. "Mmnh!" it said, as it sniffed the air greedily. "There's a delicious smell of death about the place!" It followed its nostrils and

野兽用月亮大小的保龄球砸开了门，用200磅重的砖头把其他障碍物推到一边。 钢琴摇摇摆摆地走进房间时，又弹了一曲又大又难听的曲子。 “嗯哼！”它贪婪地嗅着空气说。 “这地方有一股死亡的味道！”它跟着鼻孔走

noticed that the scent was coming from the fresh corpse of Ebenezer. "Poor Ebenezer. It's such a pity—he's one of the better servants I've had over the past thousands of years." "It's not a pity, it's murder!" said Bethany. "If you had given him the potion, he would still be alive." The beast turned its attention to Bethany. It licked its lips when it saw how big she had grown. "My, my, my, Ebenezer fed you well," it said in its soft, slithery voice. "You're as fat and juicy as a ginormous strawberry." "You still look like a big blob of gone-off mayonnaise," answered Bethany. "Ignorant brat! Can mayonnaise do this?" asked the beast. It wiggled, and hummed, and vomited out a gnome.

注意到气味来自埃比尼泽的新鲜尸体。 “可怜的埃比尼泽。真可惜——他是我几千年来雇过的最好的仆人之一。” “这不是遗憾，这是谋杀！”宝芬妮说。 “如果你给了他药水，他就还活着。” 野兽把注意力转向了宝芬妮。 当它看到她长得这么大时，舔了舔嘴唇。 “我的，我的，我的，埃比尼泽把你喂得很好，”它用轻柔、滑溜溜的声音说。 “你又肥又多汁，像个大草莓。” “你看起来还是像一大块变质的蛋黄酱，”宝芬妮回答。 “无知的顽童!蛋黄酱能做到吗？”野兽问。 它扭动着，哼哼着，吐出了一个地精。

"No, and I wouldn't want it to. It would totally ruin my chips," answered Bethany. "Also, if I wanted one of those, I could just order one from the garden center." "Foolish child! Can your precious garden center deliver this?" It wiggled and hummed and vomited out a thumb-sized triangular bottle, containing a peculiar-looking blue liquid. The sight made Bethany raise her eyebrows. "That is the elixir of life—a magical potion containing all the vitamins needed for youth, life, beauty, and shiny hair. It's so powerful, even I can't control it, like I do with the piano and all the other things," said the beast, mightily pleased with itself. It paused to think for a moment. "I wonder whether it could bring Ebenezer back. It's going to be

“不，我也不希望这样。 那会毁了我的筹码，”宝芬妮回答。 “而且，如果我想要一个，我可以从园艺中心订购一个。” “傻孩子!你那珍贵的花园中心能送这个吗？”它扭动着，哼哼着，吐出一个拇指大小的三角形瓶子，里面装着一种奇怪的蓝色液体。 这一幕让宝芬妮扬起了眉毛。 “那是长生不老药——一种神奇的药水，含有保持青春、生命、美丽和光泽头发所需的所有维生素。 它是如此强大，甚至我都无法控制它，就像我控制钢琴和所有其他东西一样。”野兽说，对自己非常满意。 它停下来想了一会儿。 “我想知道它是否能让埃比尼泽起死回生。 它会是

such a pain finding someone else to bring me my meals." "It's a bit—" Bethany began. "Impressive? Mind-boggling? Applause-worthy?" The beast looked most smug. "No. I was going to say that it's a bit—" "Better than a garden center? More extraordinary than a spoonful of mayonnaise?" "No! Frankly, it's a bit… small," Bethany said. The mood hadn't exactly been toasty, but now it dropped by another few dozen degrees. The beast was not one of those creatures who was responsive to feedback. "Small?" asked the beast. "Sorry, did you say the magical, age-defying, life-redefining potion was small?"

找别人给我送饭真是太痛苦了。” “有点——”宝芬妮开始说。 “令人印象深刻的?令人难以置信? Applause-worthy ?”那只野兽看上去非常得意。 “没有。我想说它有点——”“比花园中心好？ 比一勺蛋黄酱还特别吗？”“不!坦率地说，它有点……小，”宝芬妮说。 气氛本来不太暖和，但现在又下降了几十度。 这只野兽不是那种对反馈有反应的生物。 “小？”野兽问。“对不起，你是说那种神奇的、能抵抗衰老的、能重新定义生命的药剂很小吗？”

"I actually said a bit small," said Bethany. "I'll have you know that I gave that potion to Ebenezer and it kept him young and beautiful and shiny-haired for an entire year!" roared the beast. "And I can make as much of it as I like!" The beast proved its point by wiggling and humming and vomiting again. The end result was another triangular, blue-liquid-filled bottle, which was the size of an entire hand. "That one contains enough liquid to keep someone young and beautiful and shiny- haired for an entire decade!" boasted the beast. Bethany shrugged. She pretended not to be impressed. The beast vomited again, this time producing a triangular bottle the size of an

“其实我说的是有点小，”宝芬妮说。 “我要告诉你，我给埃比尼泽喝了那种魔药，它使他一整年都保持年轻、漂亮，头发闪闪发亮！” “我想怎么做就怎么做！”那野兽又扭动、哼哼、呕吐，证明了自己的观点。 最后的结果是另一个三角形的蓝色液体瓶子，它有一整只手那么大。 “那个瓶子里的液体足够让一个人保持年轻、美丽、有光泽的头发整整十年！” 伯大尼耸耸肩。她假装不以为然。 野兽又吐了起来，这次吐出了一个三角形的瓶子

entire arm—one large enough to hold seventy years' worth of potion doses. "That's more like it," said Bethany. She could see the potion more clearly, now that it was in a bigger bottle. It swirled around with an electric energy and seemed to have a mind of its own. The beast sat down, because it was rather tired out by all the waddling and vomiting. "Come and take a closer look, if you like," said the beast. Bethany took a step forward and the beast's three black eyes sparkled with excitement. She stopped, and then took a step back. "I know what you're trying to do," she said. The excitement in the beast's eyes was now replaced with irritation.

整整一只胳膊——一只大得足以装下七十年的魔药。 “这才像话，”宝芬妮说。 现在药水装在一个更大的瓶子里，她看药水看得更清楚了。 它带着一种电能旋转着，似乎有自己的思想。 野兽坐了下来，因为它摇摇摆摆，呕吐得很累。 “如果你愿意的话，过来仔细看看。”野兽说。 宝芬妮向前迈了一步，那只野兽的三只黑眼睛兴奋地闪烁着光芒。 她停了下来，然后向后退了一步。 “我知道你想干什么，”她说。 野兽眼中的兴奋现在变成了恼怒。