10 WARNING!

CHAPTER 10 WARNING! Greetings, dear reader! My name is Andrew. I am your humble narrator and—along with Terence Denton—the co-creator of the Treehouse Chronicles, which is a full and honest account of our lives in a unique elevated dwelling.

If you show a kinship to the majority of our readership—that is to say, if you are possessed of a lively spirit and an inquiring mind—you may, perchance, have found yourself pondering the reasons for my—and Terence's—frequent lapses of memory during the course of the preceding pages. 'Hey, Andy!' says Terence. 'Not now, Terence,' I say. 'I am currently engaged in a matter of the utmost narratorial urgency and must not be interrupted under any circumstances.'

'But—' says Terence. 'I am terribly sorry,' I say, 'but I really must insist that you refrain from these irrelevant interjections that threaten the great and important enterprise I am currently embarked upon.' 'But—' splutters Terence. 'What is the matter with you today, Terence?' I say. 'Do you not have sufficient intellectual faculties to comprehend plain English?'

'Plain English I can understand,' says Terence. 'But I can't understand a single other word you just said and I don't think our readers can either.' 'Poppycock and fiddlesticks!' I say. 'I will have you know my multi-syllabic narrative powers are without comparison in the realms of literary endeavour and my works are admired across the entire universe by

civilisations both known and yet to be discovered. There are more things in heaven and earth, Terence, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.' 'I don't know what you're talking about,' says Terence. 'But it sounds like you swallowed a dictionary for breakfast. And for your information, my name is Terry, not Terence!'

'Actually, I think you will find that in actual fact Terry is an abbreviation of both Terrance and Terrell. It is also an Anglicised phonetic form of the French given name Thierry, a Norman French form of Theodoric from an older Germanic name meaning "small-brained one".' 'What's wrong with Andy?' says Alice. 'I don't know,' says Albert. 'I can't understand him any more.' 'Neither can I,' says Jill. 'I think we've made him too smart for his own good!'