3 Why the Sharks Ate Terry’s Underpants

CHAPTER 3 WHY THE SHARKS ATE TERRY'S UNDERPANTS I look at Terry for a minute as I try to understand what he just said. "I'm sorry," I say. "I must have misheard you. It sounded like you said the sharks ate your underpants."

"I did say that!" says Terry. "And now the sharks are really sick! They're just lying on the bottom of the tank not moving." "But why did they eat your underpants?" I say. "I mean, how did they even get them?" "Well," he says, "I came up with the idea of using the shark tank to wash my underpants. I dangled a dummy over the top of the water and the sharks thought it was a real person, and were jumping all around trying to bite it, and that churned up the water—you know, like in a washing machine. "So then I put my underpants on the end of a stick and lowered them into the water.

"But the sharks were jumping around so much, they knocked the underpants off the stick and then they ate them. Now the sharks are just lying on the bottom of the tank and they've turned a weird green color!" You know, Terry has done some dumb things in the past, but this has got to be the dumbest ever!

The top 5 dumbest things Terry has ever done. 5. Put gelatin (lots) in the penguin bath. 4. Rode his horse along the beach and past the sign that read DANGER: QUICKSAND It's going to work out just fine, Horse.

3. Went rowing with his elephant friend. 2. Took his bad constrictor to a movie. 1. Tried to wash his underpants in the shark tanks.

"What are we going to do, Andy?" says Terry. "I'm not sure," I say. "If only we knew somebody who loves animals and knows all about them and lives close by so they could get here in a hurry." "Yeah," says Terry, "somebody like Jill." "Yeah," I say, "somebody exactly like Jill." "Hey, I know!" says Terry. "Why don't we call Jill?" "Great idea!" I say. In case you don't know who Jill is, she's our neighbor. She lives just on the other side of the forest and she loves animals and knows all about them. She's got two dogs, a goat, three horses, four goldfish, one cow, six rabbits, two guinea pigs, one camel, one donkey, and thirteen flying cats.