7 Principal Gradgrind

CHAPTER 7 PRINCIPAL GRADGRIND The door opens and a man wearing a military uniform marches into the room and glares at us. Everybody in the class, including Ms. Treacle, jumps to attention. (Well, everybody except Terry, who's still swinging from the ceiling fan.) "Good morning, Principal Gradgrind," says Ms. Treacle. "GOOD?" he shouts. "I don't see what's good about

it! I can hardly hear myself think above all the noise coming from this classroom." "Well, you should think louder then," says Terry. "That's what I do when it gets too noisy in the treehouse." "Who said that?" says Principal Gradgrind, looking all around him. "I did!" says Terry. "Up here!"

Principal Gradgrind looks up and sees Terry. "What on earth are you doing up there?" he says. "Get down at once!" "I'd be happy to," says Terry. "But it's not that easy. My emergency inflatable underpants are stuck in the fan." "Then I'd advise you to get them unstuck as fast as possible!" says Principal Gradgrind. "I'll try," says Terry. He pulls and tugs at his underpants. There's a loud ripping noise and then he falls…

and lands right on top of Principal Gradgrind! "Get off me this instant!" says Principal Gradgrind, struggling to get out from underneath Terry. I offer Terry my hand and pull him up. Principal Gradgrind staggers to his feet and turns to face Ms. Treacle. "What is going on here?" he says. "May I remind you this is a classroom, not a circus!" "I'm very sorry, Principal Gradgrind," says Ms. Treacle. "But, you see, we have some new students and they don't know all the rules yet." "Well, they'd better learn them, and fast!" says Principal Gradgrind, glaring at Terry and Jill and me. "And one of the most important rules is NO SWINGING FROM THE CEILING FAN!"

"Why not?" says Terry. "WHY NOT?" shouts Principal Gradgrind. "Because it's a rule, that's why not! And speaking of rules, what's that rabbit doing in here? We have a strict no-animals policy, you know. No bringing animals of any kind to school, is that clear?" "Yes, I suppose so," says Jill. "But I didn't bring the rabbit with me— it came flying in through the window. All I did was catch it."

"Well, if you'd bothered learning the rules, you'd also know we have a strict no-catching policy as well," says Principal Gradgrind. He unrolls a long piece of paper and starts reading: "No catching balls! No catching colds! No catching trains! And above all, no catching rabbits! You three had better hurry up and learn the rules by three thirty today… OR ELSE!"