9. Baby Drool, Foot Sweat, and Other Problems

Chapter 9 Baby Drool, Foot Sweat, and Other Problems Mom drove me to Gus's house that afternoon after school. Gus was sitting on the front porch. His mom was helping his little brother, Albert, ride a blue plastic trike. His dad had Babette in a pouch thingie that hung from his chest. He looked like a kangaroo with a beard. My mom ran over to make ooh-how-cute noises about the baby. I ran over to Gus to make ooh-how-gross noises about the baby. When Mom finally drove off, I am pretty sure she was still oohing in the car. "So, Roscoe," said Gus's dad, "these are the famous Walkie-Talkies I've heard so much about." I held up a foot so he could see one.

孩子流口水、脚汗和其他问题那天下午放学后，妈妈开车送我去格斯家。 格斯坐在前廊上。 他的妈妈正在帮他的弟弟阿尔伯特骑一辆蓝色的塑料三轮车。 他爸爸把巴贝特放在挂在胸前的袋子里。 他看起来像一只长着胡子的袋鼠。 我妈妈跑过来对孩子发出了可爱的声音。 我跑到格斯身边，对着孩子发出恶心的声音。 当妈妈终于开车离开时，我敢肯定她还在车里呜呜叫。 “那么，罗斯科，”格斯的爸爸说，“这些就是我久负盛名的对讲机。” 我举起一只脚，让他看到一只。

As he leaned over, Babette drooled on my sock. I tried not to look shocked. But I was for sure going to have to throw that sock away when I got home. "You push this button here," I said. "And if someone else has Walkie-Talkies, you can talk to them." "Wow," said Gus's dad. "How cool is that? Do they come in adult sizes?" "Gary," said Gus's mom, "you're not really helping." "Oops," said Gus's dad. He winked at Gus. "They are awesome, Gus. When your sneakers wear out, we'll talk about it." "These are Ruff and Tuffs, Dad. They never wear out," said Gus. Gus's dad was about to answer, but Babette started crying. "Gotta change the kid," said Gus's dad. Just then, Albert tipped over on his trike and skinned his elbow. He cried even louder than Babette. "Boys, you two will have to come inside while we take care of the little ones," Gus's mom said.

他俯下身来，巴贝特在我的袜子上流口水。 我尽量装出不震惊的样子。 但是当我回到家的时候，我肯定得把那只袜子扔掉。 “你按这个按钮，”我说。 “如果别人有对讲机，你可以和他们说话。” “哇，”格斯的爸爸说。“这太酷了!” 有成人尺码的吗?”“加里，”格斯的妈妈说，“你这是在帮倒忙。” “哎呀，”格斯的爸爸说。他朝格斯眨了眨眼睛。 “他们太棒了，格斯。等你的运动鞋穿坏了，我们再谈。” “这是拉夫和塔夫斯，爸爸。 它们永远不会磨损，”格斯说。 格斯的爸爸正要回答，但巴贝特哭了起来。 “得给孩子换尿布了，”格斯的爸爸说。 就在这时，艾伯特在他的三轮车上摔倒了，肘部擦破了皮。 他哭得比巴贝特还大声。 格斯的妈妈说:“孩子们，你们俩得进来，我们来照顾小的。”

We followed the two screaming kids and Gus's parents inside. The house smelled like baby. "Gus!" his dad said. "Could you bring me some baby wipes? They're in the diaper bag in Babette's room." "And grab that box of Band-Aids in the bathroom, Gus," added his mom. "Sometimes I hate being a big brother," Gus muttered. "I know it's hard, sweetheart," said his mom. Gus headed up the stairs. A few minutes later, he came back with a box of baby wipes and some Band-Aids. "Let's go play in my room," he said. "There's too many little kids down here. It's like an alien invasion." Gus's room was even messier than mine. I sat down on a pile of dirty clothes and felt right at home.

我们跟着两个尖叫的孩子和格斯的父母进了屋。 房子里有婴儿的味道。 “格斯!”他爸爸说。“你能给我拿些婴儿湿巾吗?” 它们在巴贝特房间的尿布袋里。” “把浴室里的那盒创可贴拿过来，格斯，”他妈妈补充说。 “有时候我讨厌当大哥。”格斯嘟囔着。 “我知道这很难，宝贝，”他妈妈说。 格斯走上楼梯。几分钟后，他带着一盒婴儿湿巾和一些创可贴回来了。 “我们去我的房间玩吧，”他说。 “下面的小孩太多了。 就像外星人入侵一样。” 格斯的房间比我的还乱。 我坐在一堆脏衣服上，感觉就像在家里一样。

"I remember when Hazel was a baby," I said. "My parents paid all the attention to her. It was like Max and me didn't even exist." Gus nodded. "Lately, I feel like I'm invisible." "You're not invisible to me!" I said. I tossed a dirty sock at Gus and scored a direct hit. "There's proof!" I said. "I can see you just fine!" Gus just lay there. He didn't even fire the sock back at me. I had to cheer him up somehow. "Gus," I said. "I've got a great idea. I want you to wear my Walkie-Talkies for a while. For a

“我记得Hazel还是个婴儿的时候，”我说。 “我的父母把所有的注意力都放在了她身上。 就好像麦克斯和我根本不存在一样。” 格斯点了点头。“最近，我觉得自己像个隐形人。” “我又不是看不见你!”我说。 我朝格斯扔了只脏袜子，结果直接命中。 “有证据!”我说。“我看得很清楚!”格斯就躺在那儿。 他甚至都没有用袜子回击我。 我得想办法让他高兴起来。 “格斯，”我说。“我有一个好主意。 我想让你戴一段时间我的对讲机。 对于一个

whole day, even." I thought for a moment. "No! For a whole entire week!" Gus sat up on his elbows. "You'd do that for me?" I kicked off my shoes. "Here. Try them on." Gus tried to put on my right Walkie-Talkie. He made a face and shook his head. "Foot sweat?" I asked. "No, it's just that my feet are too big to fit." "Squeeze harder," I said. Gus tried again. "I feel like Cinderella with the glass slipper." "Actually, the slipper fit Cinderella. You would be an ugly stepsister," I said. Finally, Gus managed to squeeze his feet into both shoes. He stood up. He was a little wobbly, on account of his squished condition. "Ow," he said. "They're amazing. Ow. But I don't think I could wear them for a whole week. My feet would probably fall off. Thanks, though." "You'll get some Walkie-Talkies soon, Gus," I said. "Your sneakers have to fall apart eventually, right?" "I suppose."

甚至一整天。”我想了一会儿。 “不!整整一个星期!”格斯用胳膊肘撑着坐了起来。 “你会为我这么做吗?”我踢掉了鞋子。 “在这里。试试吧。”格斯想戴上我右边的对讲机。 他做了个鬼脸，摇了摇头。 “脚汗?”我问。“不，只是我的脚太大了，穿不进去。” “用力挤，”我说。格斯又试了一次。 “我感觉自己就像穿着水晶鞋的灰姑娘。” “事实上，这只拖鞋适合灰姑娘。 你会是一个丑陋的继姐妹，”我说。 最后，格斯设法把两只鞋都塞进了脚。 他站了起来。由于身体被压扁了，他有点摇摇晃晃的。 “噢，”他说。“他们真了不起。 噢。但我觉得我穿不了整整一个星期。 我的脚可能会掉下来。 谢谢,不过。”“你很快就会有对讲机的，格斯，”我说。 “你的运动鞋最终还是会散架的，对吧?”“我想”。

"How can shoes refuse to die?" I asked. "Dad says all my sneakers wear out in a week." I picked up one of the Ruff and Tuffs. "I know what their ads say," I said. "But these sure look like regular old sneakers. I'll bet you I could wear them out in no time!" "I wish you could," Gus said. "Then I'd finally get my own Walkie-Talkies!" And that's when it hit me. I, Mr. Destructo-feet, was the answer to Gus's Walkie-Talkie prayers. "Gus," I said. "Let me borrow your sneakers for a day. I guarantee you'll need a new pair of shoes in no time, if my feet have anything to say about it!"

“鞋子怎么能拒绝死亡呢?”我问。 “爸爸说我所有的运动鞋一个星期就穿坏了。” 我买了一件拉夫和塔夫斯。 “我知道他们的广告是怎么说的，”我说。 “但这些运动鞋看起来确实像普通的旧运动鞋。 我跟你打赌，我很快就能把它们穿坏!”“我希望你能，”格斯说。 “那我终于有自己的对讲机了!”就在那时，我突然意识到。 我，毁灭脚先生，是格斯对讲机祈祷的答案。 “格斯，”我说。“让我借你的运动鞋用一天。 我保证你很快就需要一双新鞋了，如果我的脚有什么要说的话!”