7 Eat Dirt!

Chapter 7 EAT DIRT! As Hugo dropped a handful of garbage into the bin, Andrew tumbled out of the eggshell and got smacked in the head by a green pea and slammed by a pickle. "Ooofers!" yelled Andrew as he landed on a shred of newspaper. A damp-cellar smell filled his nose—the smell of dirt. A shadow fell over the bin. Hugo's big hands were heading down. They began to stir the garbage—and Andrew— into the dirt. Andrew flicked on his flashlight. What could protect him from getting crushed by those giant fingers? There's a peanut shell! thought Andrew. He scrambled under the igloo shape and scraped the

dirt away. The fingers were pushing his peanut shell down and down! Then the shell stopped moving. But other things were moving. It felt like rough hairbrushes were scratching Andrew's arms and legs. Reddish brown worms that looked like bulgy garden hoses were tunneling through the garbage and dirt—and over Andrew!

"Yowzers!" yelled Andrew. "These guys are scratchy!" meep… "Worms got bristles," said Thudd. "Use bristles to dig through dirt. Help worm to stick in wormhole, not get pulled out by bird." One of the worms stopped in front of Andrew. All Andrew could see was a brown flap. meep… "Head of worm," said Thudd. "Worm not got eyes. Not got nose. Not got ears. But flap in front of mouth tell worm about light. Tell worm about smells. Worm feel stuff move." The worm lifted its flap. Beneath was a mouth that looked like an inner tube. Dirt and bits of paper and lettuce were getting dragged into the mouth. It was like a vacuum cleaner! meep… "Worm suck in dirt," said Thudd. "Eat bits of food and lotsa bacteria. Poop out castings." Another worm wriggled up to Andrew's face and lifted its flap. Andrew tried to squirm out of the way, but the worm pressed its slimy, rubbery mouth against Andrew's nose.

"Yuck!" shouted Andrew. He tried to shove the worm's gooey flap away. "This worm is awfully strong!" meep… "Worm is all muscle," said Thudd. "Worm lot stronger than same-sized human." Thwap… thwap… thwap… Something was pounding on the other side of the peanut shell. "I hear you!" said a voice Andrew knew well. "Judy!" said Andrew. "I need a little help here." Judy crept around to the inside of the shell. "Eeeuw!" she said when she saw the worm sucking Andrew's nose. "It loves you!" "Matilda, NO!" Andrew heard Hugo yell. Suddenly something latched on to the peanut shell and shook it. The worm came loose from Andrew's nose. Andrew and Judy pulled the shell over themselves. A fishy stink mixed with the smell of garbage and dirt. The peanut shell was going up like a fast elevator. The beam of Andrew's flashlight showed

they were in a small space with curving yellow walls. "Matilda!" shouted Hugo. "Hope you're not eatin' my hardworkin' worms! That's why I feed ya peanuts!" But the seagull paid no attention to Hugo's shouts. It was flying off—with Andrew and Judy in its beak!