8 Mummy the Mummy

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Mummy the MUMMY WHEN IS A MUMMY not a mummy? When the mummy is, in fact, a mummy. Please indulge me for one moment. Let's begin this HORROR story with a history lesson.

This is a mummy... ...an Ancient Egyptian who, after death, had been mummified to prepare them for the afterlife. The priests of the time would remove all the insides except the heart, embalm the body to preserve it, then wrap it from head to toe in strips of linen until it was completely covered. These mummies were discovered thousands of years later by archaeologists, who found their tombs buried

deep under the sand in the deserts of Egypt. Legend has it that disturbing these burial sites causes ancient curses to be unleashed. Many of the archaeologists died in Mysterious circumstances. Some even believed that if you unearthed these mummies they came back to life as monsters! Now, this is also a mummy: This is Jess's mummy. Jess is a little girl in glasses who loves her mummy, even though she is the clumsiest person on earth.

Jess's mummy was a lovely lady who wore brightly coloured dresses and big flowery hats. This was just as well, as you could see her coming from a mile away. Every time she had a mishap, she said, "WHOOPSIES!" Mummy was a one-woman disaster zone: Stepping inside the house from a rainstorm, Mummy closed her umbrella on her head. She couldn't see a thing. SNUTCH! "WHOOPSIES!" Mummy stumbled through the house and into the back garden. There, she stepped into the pond. SPLOOSH! "WHOOPSIES!" Impatiently waiting for a piece of toast to pop out of a toaster, Mummy found herself peering in. The piece of toast shot up and whacked her on the nose. BONK! "WHOOPSIES!"

Shoving a heavy book on to the wrong shelf at the library, Mummy set off a chain reaction. Every single book toppled over like dominoes, burying her under a mountain of books. THUNK! "WHOOPSIES!" Repairing a vase that she had broken, Mummy managed to superglue her dress to the table without realising. GLOOP! When she stood up and walked away, her dress stayed stuck to the table. RIP! Mummy stood there in her undercrackers. "WHOOPSIES!" Once Mummy got her shampoo bottle and her tomato-ketchup bottles mixed up. So she ate some shampoo-flavoured chips... "YUCK!" and her hair turned bright red. "WHOOPSIES!"