10 Kung Fu Kylie

Kung Fu KYLIE KYLIE WAS A girl who loved whacking people. Whacking people indiscriminately is guaranteed to earn you a place in a book about the world's worst children. The girl spent all her time playing beat-'em-up computer games, and watching Kung Fu films. Diligently she studied all the moves, and practised them in her bedroom mirror.

凯莉是一个喜欢打人的女孩。 不加选择地打别人肯定会让你在一本关于世界上最糟糕的孩子的书中占有一席之地。 这个女孩把所有的时间都花在打游戏和看功夫电影上。 她勤奋地学习所有的动作，并对着卧室的镜子练习。

Kylie had no formal training in martial arts, but that didn't stop her from dressing in white pyjamas, tying a black sock round her head and going everywhere barefoot. In no time, Kylie had kung-Fued the three toughest boys in her school. A flying chop was enough to make Biggie scream for mercy. "HI-VA!" shouted Kylie. "Nooo!" A cartwheel kick put an end to the Plopper's glittering career in bullying. "HI-YA!" "HELP!"

凯莉没有接受过正式的武术训练，但这并不妨碍她穿着白色睡衣，头上系着黑色袜子，光着脚到处走。 没过多久，凯莉就打败了学校里三个最难对付的男孩。 一个飞劈足以让胖胖尖叫求饶。 “HI-VA!”凯莉喊道。“人参公鸡!”一个侧手踢结束了Plopper辉煌的霸凌生涯。 “你好!”“救命!”

And a poke on the nose reduced Pongo to a gibbering wreck. "HI-YA!" "OUCH! I want my mummy!" "Now you will all bow down before me- Kung Fu Kylie!" she announced in the playground after she had vanquished all three. Next, she turned her martial-arts skills on her teacher. When Mr Twig gave her an F in his Geography test, Kung Fu Kylie leaped off the top of the lockers... "HI-YA!" ...giving him a chop on the chops. "ARGH!" yelled the teacher, and promptly changed the mark to an A*.

鼻子上的一戳使庞戈变成了一个胡言乱语的残骸。 “你好!”“哎哟!我要妈妈！”“现在你们都要在我面前鞠躬——功夫凯莉！”在击败了这三个人之后，她在操场上宣布。 接下来，她把自己的武功交给了她的老师。 当崔格先生在地理考试中给她不及格时，功夫凯莉从储物柜顶上跳了下来…… “你好!”…给他上一刀。 “天啊！”老师大叫一声，马上把分数改成了A*。

Setting homework is something that the girl's Maths teacher, Mrs Plimplam, is unlikely to ever do again. The last time she tried, Kung Fu Kylie did a spinning kick, sending her worksheets scattering into the air. "HI-YA!" "NOOOOOO!" cried Mrs Plimplam, chasing after them. "My precious babies!" And when the dinner lady, Mrs Mung, didn't serve up enough chips for Kylie - and Kylie really, really loved chips - she was dispatched across the dining hall on one of her own food trollies. "HI-YA!" "GOOOODBYYYYYEEEEE!"

布置家庭作业是这个女孩的数学老师Plimplam女士不太可能再做的事情。 最后一次尝试时，功夫凯莉做了一个旋转踢腿，把她的练习册甩到空中。 “你好!”“不——不！”普林拉姆太太追着他们叫道。 “我亲爱的孩子们！”当服务员Mung夫人没有给Kylie提供足够的薯条时——Kylie真的非常非常喜欢薯条——她被自己的食品手推车打发到餐厅的另一头。 “你好!”“GOOOODBYYYYYEEEEE !”

Kylie's own family was not safe from her kung fu. When her grandfather wanted to watch snooker rather than cartoons, Kylie announced, "Prepare to meet thy doom, Grandpa Ted!" POW! "Ow! Here's the remote!" Another night, Kylie's mother was munching her way through a box of her favourite chocolates, and refusing to share. "Mother! Bow down before the mighty power of me, the chosen one! Giveth me the walnut whirl!" "Never!" "Argh! Kylie! You horrible girl! Now me chocolates have gone everywhere!"

凯莉的家人在她的功夫面前也不安全。 当她的祖父想看斯诺克而不是卡通片时，凯莉宣布：“准备好迎接你的厄运吧，泰德爷爷！”战俘!“噢!遥控器在这儿！”另一天晚上，凯莉的妈妈狼吞虎咽地吃完一盒她最喜欢的巧克力，拒绝和她分享。 “妈妈!在我的大能面前屈身吧，我是天选之子！给我核桃圈！”“从来没有!”“啊!凯莉!你这个可怕的女孩！现在我的巧克力到处都是！”