10 Sofia Sofa

SOFIA Sofa ALL SOFIA WANTED TO DO was sit on the sofa all day, watching television. Sofia Sofa was without doubt one of the absolute worst children in the world. She never went to school, or helped her mum with chores around the house, or even got up to have dinner at the dining table. All she did was sit and watch TV.

索非亚整天只想坐在沙发上看电视。 索菲亚·沙索无疑是世界上最坏的孩子之一。 她从不去上学，也不帮妈妈做家务，甚至不起床在餐桌上吃晚饭。 她所做的就是坐着看电视。

It didn't matter what was on: Soap operas, GAME SHOWS, detective shows, gardening programmes, talent shows, CARTOONS, POLITICAL PROGRAMMES, even shows about old boring junk that the presenter pretended were priceless ANTIQUES. As long as the screen was flickering, Sofia was glued to it. Adverts were her absolute favourite. Sometimes she felt that the programmes got in the way of the adverts. All day and all night Sofia would sit slumped on the sofa in front of the TV, eating and watching. Crisps, biscuits, cake, sweets and chocolate were her favourite foods to gobble as she watched. If an advert came on for crisps, biscuits, cake, sweets or chocolate then she would shout out to her mum to bring her more. "M-U-V-V-E-R!" she would yell. "CHOCOLATE-NOW!"

不管是什么节目：肥皂剧、游戏节目、侦探节目、园艺节目、才艺节目、卡通片、政治节目，甚至是主持人假装是无价古董的无聊旧垃圾节目。 只要屏幕还在闪烁，索菲亚就会全神贯注地盯着它。 广告是她的最爱。 有时她觉得节目妨碍了广告。 索菲亚整天整夜瘫坐在电视机前的沙发上，边吃边看。 薯片、饼干、蛋糕、糖果和巧克力是她看电视时最喜欢吃的食物。 如果出现薯片、饼干、蛋糕、糖果或巧克力的广告，她就会喊妈妈再给她带一些来。 “M-U-V-V-E-R!” “巧克力!”

The girl's poor mum (she was poor because she had to spend all her money on colossal amounts of food for her daughter) would have to dash out to the corner shop to buy Sofia a bar of chocolate. However, by the time the woman returned home, Sofia would have seen another advert for something else she wanted to scoff and she'd send her mum straight back out the door again. "M-U-V-V-E-R! CAKE!" Watching and eating. Eating and watching. That is all Sofia did. Her eyes had actually become square from staring at the box all day. The only exercise Sofia took was changing channels on the television. But because she had a remote control this was nothing more than pressing a button with her finger. Still sometimes her finger would get tired and she would shout out to her mum, "M-U-V-V-E-R! CHANNEL THREE. NOW!" It will come as no surprise to you that one day Sofia's mum decided enough was enough.

这个女孩可怜的妈妈（她穷是因为她不得不把所有的钱都花在给女儿买大量的食物上）不得不冲到街角的商店给索菲亚买一块巧克力。 然而，当这个女人回到家时，索菲亚可能已经看到了另一个她想嘲笑的东西的广告，她会把她的妈妈直接赶出门去。 “M-U-V-V-E-R !蛋糕!”边看边吃。 边吃边看。这就是索菲亚所做的。 由于整天盯着盒子看，她的眼睛实际上已经变成方形了。 索菲亚做的唯一练习就是换电视频道。 但是因为她有一个遥控器，这只不过是用她的手指按一个按钮。 但有时她的手指会累，她会对妈妈喊：“M-U-V-V-E-R!”三个频道。 现在!”有一天，索菲亚的妈妈决定受够了，这对你来说一点也不奇怪。

"It's time you stopped watching television and got off your bottom for once, young lady!" commanded the woman. "Nah, Muvver," muttered Sofia, not looking up from the television. "I just gotta find out what happens at the end of this programme fingy." "What do you mean, Sofia? The end of the episode?" asked Mum. "Nah, the end of the series," replied Sofia Sofa. "There is no end! You are watching a soap opera! It will go on FOREVER! Come on, young lady! UP!" With that Mum put her hands under her daughter's armpits and attempted to hoist her upwards. "Three, two, one... HEAVE!" Eventually she managed it, but the sofa came with Sofia. The girl had been sitting there for so long she had become completely wedged in! In fact the two had somehow fused and it was impossible to tell where the girl ended and the piece of furniture began. Sofia had become...

“你该停止看电视了，振作起来，小姑娘！”女人命令道。 “不，穆弗。”索菲亚嘟囔着，头也不抬地看着电视。 “我只是想知道这期节目最后会发生什么。” “你这是什么意思，索菲亚？”这一集的结尾？”妈妈问。 “不，是电视剧的结局，”索菲亚·索弗回答。 “没有尽头！”你在看肥皂剧！它将永远持续下去！来吧，小姐！起来!”说着，妈妈把手放在女儿的腋下，想把她往上拉。 “三，二，一……胀!”最后，她终于成功了，但沙发是索菲亚送来的。 这个女孩在那里坐了太久，她已经完全被挤进去了！事实上，这两者不知何故融合在一起了，无法分辨女孩和那件家具从哪里开始。 索菲亚变成了……

...half girl, half sofa. Not that she was bothered. The girl just carried on staring at the television throughout the whole process. When Dad returned home from work, Mum enlisted his help. Together the pair of them tried to prise their daughter from the sofa.

…一半女孩，一半沙发。但她并没有为此烦恼。 这个女孩在整个过程中一直盯着电视看。 爸爸下班回家后，妈妈找他帮忙。 他们俩一起想把女儿从沙发上撬起来。