13 Cut to the Quick

CHAPTER 13 CUT TO THE QUICK On the school bus in the morning, Tiffany is sitting between Eric and Derrick. She's smiling at both of them and doesn't even notice when I get on. I sit down two rows behind them. Eric is telling her jokes. She's laughing. How could they do this to me? I hate Eric. His jokes aren't even funny. Besides, I've heard them all before.

Derrick is showing off. He's pulling out all his baseball cards. I'll really hate him if he shows her his 1952 Mickey Mantle rookie card. Then I'm sunk. HEY, TIFFANY, WHAT DO YOU GET IF YOU CROSS A PIG WITH A FROG? WOW! THIS IS MY FAVORITE. OH. NO.

Tiffany doesn't even turn around to look at me. Now I hate her. When the school bus stops, I walk right by her. I'll show her!

I won't even say, "Hello!" if she says, "Hello!" She doesn't even bother. That's it—we're through! The dragons can have her. She can climb up her own mountains. She can swim across her own seas. I want a divorce! GET HER! HUBIE, SAVE ME!