10 Researching the Heart

CHAPTER 10 RESEARCHING THE HEART After lunch, I go visit Mrs. Beamster, our librarian, and tell her my problem. She gives me a book called Romance Through the Ages. READ THIS. THANK YOU.

It starts with Stone Age courtship. If a caveman loved a cavelady, he'd grab her by the hair and drag her off to his cave. I could try that at recess, but I think I'd get sent to the principal's office. And what if she is wearing a wig?

In the Middle Ages, knights would save their ladies from dragons. I knew that. MY HERO.

In the Romantic Age, guys would put their jackets over muddy puddles so that girls wouldn't get their feet wet. If I brought home a muddy jacket, my mom would kill me. MY DEAR.

ROMEO WAS LATE FOR DINNER AND JULIET IT ALL. Men also wrote lots of poems. It was the age of Puddles and Poems. Then later, troubadours would play guitars and sing under a lady's balcony. I wonder if Tiffany has a balcony. I don't play the guitar, but I am taking piano lessons. YOU'RE OFF-KEY.

In modern courtship, men send flowers, candy, and diamond rings. With my allowance, I could give her a chocolate-chip cookie. Boy, courtship sounds like a real trial.