2 Dressed to the Teeth

CHAPTER 2 DRESSED TO THE TEETH I NEED TO SCRATCH MY LEG. WOOL HAT LAYERS OF ITCHY WOOL GLOVES KID SNOW SUIT WOOL-LINED BOOTS And the clothes you have to wear to go outside-you're buried in layers of itchy wool. You spend half the day zipping up zippers, snapping snaps, and buckling buckles.

MEOW. Then there's the mile-long scarf your aunt knits for you that you have to wrap around and around. And don't forget the rubber overshoes that totally resist going over shoes. How DO I LOOK?

Last but not least, there's the wool cap, earmuffs, and mittens that cover up every last bit of you. REMOVABLE BALL THE DELUXE MODEL COMES WITH A MINI RADIO ADJUSTABLE TIGHT RUBBER OVERSHOES WATERPROOF BUT NOT SNOWPROOF Now you're a proper mummy, ready to be buried in the white tomb of winter.

And just when you get everything zipped, snapped, and buckled, you have to go to the bathroom, which means starting all over again. So by the time you're ready to go outside... it's dark. That's another thing— during the winter, the sun goes on vacation to Florida, and daylight only lasts for a couple of hours. I hate winter! HUBIE, DO YOU NEED TO GO TO THE BATHROOM? MAYBE.

CAN ERIC COME OUT AND PLAY?