Chapter 2

Chapter 2 "I can't believe you've been sent home again," King Alexander of Empiria scolded his daughter later that afternoon. "Why can't you behave in school?" "Because school is boring," Princess Pulverizer told him. "Everything we study is useless! Why do I need to know how to curtsy? Or learn which fork is the right one to use? Or practice staying on the beat when dancing the saltarello?" "Because those are the things every princess needs to learn," King Alexander explained. "How else will you know how to behave correctly at a banquet, or dance at a ball with grace and elegance?"

"But I don't want to be a princess," Princess Pulverizer insisted. "And I don't want to go to banquets or balls. I want to rescue damsels in distress and slay dragons. I want to have sword fights. I want to be a knight." "Excuse me?" the king asked, surprised. "A knight," Princess Pulverizer repeated. "I want to go out into the world, have adventures, and earn my place among the Knights of the Skround Table."

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Princess Pulverizer looked longingly across the room. The Skround Table was so beautiful —perfectly square, but with carefully rounded corners. Skround. The Skround Table was where the knights gathered to talk about their exciting quests. Princess Pulverizer wanted nothing more than to sit there among them. To be one of them. "I don't need to go to the Royal School of Ladylike Manners to be a knight," Princess Pulverizer continued. "I need to go to Knight School." "Actually, knights need to know a lot of the same things you are learning in school," the king told her. "Like what?" Princess Pulverizer asked. "Well, you are learning to dance gracefully," the king replied. "Every sword fight is like a dance. A knight who is light on his feet will always win. But a clumsy knight will land on his behind every time."

Princess Pulverizer frowned. It was hard to argue with logic like that. Although... "Does a knight really need to know which fork to use to eat salad?" she asked her father. "Or how to pour a perfect cup of tea?" The king stared at his daughter. "You've got me there," he admitted. Princess Pulverizer smiled triumphantly. "But there are still a lot of other things you can learn from Lady Frump," the king continued. "You need to go back to the Royal School of Ladylike Manners." Princess Pulverizer's eyes flew open wide in surprise. She couldn't believe her father was making her go back to that horrible place. "B-b-but you have to let me go to Knight School," Princess Pulverizer insisted. "Why?" her father asked her. "Because I want to go," Princess Pulverizer told him. "And I'm a princess. Princesses always get what they want." "Not this time." The king shook his head.

"I am going to Knight School," the princess declared. She folded her arms tightly across her chest. "No, you're not," the king replied. He folded his arms tightly across his chest. "You are going back to Lady Frump." "Am not! Am not! Am not!" Princess Pulverizer started jumping up and down and shouting. "I shouldn't have to listen to Lady Frump. She should have to listen to me. I'm the princess." "But she is your teacher," the king said. "In school, she is in charge." Princess Pulverizer shook her head. "This isn't fair!" she shouted. "You won't let me go to Knight School because I'm a girl. That's not right!"