12 SSTAGE FRIGHT

CHAPTER 12 STAGE FRIGHT Alexander peeked through the curtains. The auditorium was filling up fast. Mr. Hoarsely was setting up a microphone. And along one wall was a cafeteria cart, loaded with brownies. "Ah! Just what we need," Alexander whispered. "Guys, I'll be right back." "Okay, but hurry!" said Nikki. Alexander jogged down a dark passageway and through a narrow side door.

He made his way through the crowd. He could see Principal Vanderpants talking to Mr. Mingus, off to one side. "Ooof!" Alexander bumped into Stanley the Steam Shovel. Actually, it wasn't Stanley It was someone dressed as Stanley. Actually, it wasn't someone— it was his dad. "Howdy, AI!" his dad said. "Uh, hi, Dad," said Alexander. "I can't talk right now— I'm kind of busy." "Oh, me, too!" said Alexander's dad. "They've got me passing out treats! Here, have a brownie!"

Thanks, Dad— just what I needed!" said Alexander. He took a brownie and turned to head backstage. But then the lights flashed. "It's about to start!" said Alexander's dad. Principal Vanderpants stood onstage. "Good morning, students," she said, speaking into a microphone. "You know our visiting author from such books as Stanley Eats His Lima Beans and Stanley and the Thank-You-copter. Let's give a big welcome to Morty C. Mingus."

Mr. Mingus took the stage. "Thank you, Stermont Elementary," he said. "Why don't I start by telling some knock-knock jokes?" The crowd clapped politely. Except for Alexander's dad, who was jumping, whistling, and cheering. Alexander made his way back to the side door. "WHOA!" said Rip's voice from the other side of the curtains.

Ms. Vanderpants's eyes narrowed as she tilted her head toward the curtains. Alexander raced along the dark passageway back to his friends. "Rip," he whispered. "I could hear you out front." "Sorry, Salamander," said Rip. "But check out the ants!" said Nikki. Ants were still swarming around Rip's cookie. But they were no longer black— they were bright blue. "Whoa!" said Alexander. "Shhh!" said Rip. "Vanderpants might hear you."

From the other side of the curtain, Alexander could hear the audience groan at one of Mr. Mingus's jokes. The ants wiggled a bit, and then— BA-DINK! BA-DINK! BA-DINK! They grew larger and larger. The S.S.M.P. was surrounded by an army of huge blue ant creatures.