4 Oh No, We’re Not

CHAPTER FOUR OH NO, WE'RE NOT Miss Shelly looked around the room. Everybody was ready to talk about his or her hobbies. She pointed at Erin. "Erin, would you like to go first?" Erin jumped to her feet and started a tape player. As the music began, she performed a classic foot-stomping Irish dance.

The students clapped. Franny raised her hand.

"So, Erin, about these shoes of yours. Have you ever considered splicing in a sample of mutant kangaroo DNA? It might make you bounce around in an even more uncontrolled manner." Erin looked at Franny for a momen.t. "My dancing is just fine, thank you," she said, and took her seat.

Next Miss Shelly invited Lawrence to the front of the class. He pulled an accordion from a big black case and played for a minute or two before Franny raised her hand.

"Ah. Now this is much better. I'm certain that you could operate the keys in different ways to increase or decrease the amount of pain we're experiencing around our ear regions. My question for you is this: Have you ever thought of making a larger version that you could attach to a satellite and use to broadcast this effect over a larger area?"

Lawrence put the instrument back in the case. "It's just an accordion, Franny," he said. "I've been playing it since I was a little kid."