2. Hello, Please, and Thank You

2 Hello, Please, and Thank You In an empty airplane hangar, Mr. Dart stood holding a floppy hat with a fur brim and a shirt with puffy sleeves. "While in France, you will be disguised as a member of King Francis I's court, as painted by the magnificent Renaissance painter Jean Clouet," he told Stanley. Stanley blinked. "You mean I have to change now?"

"I'm afraid so," Mr. Dart said, handing Stanley the hat and shirt. "The only way to keep your arrival secret is for you to travel like any other priceless work of art." Stanley changed his clothes, and a makeup artist powdered his skin and attached a beard on his face. When he was finally ready, Stanley climbed inside the frame. Because it was only a

portrait from the waist up, he had to fold his legs behind the canvas. Mr. Dart stepped back and looked Stanley over. "Clouet painted all the most important people in France during the early sixteenth century," he said. "But if I do say so myself, this may be his best work." Mr. Dart carefully lifted Stanley's frame and laid it in a wooden crate. The crate had airholes and was filled with shredded paper for comfort. "Your mother has sent a cheese sandwich, some celery sticks, a bag of pretzels, and a juice box for your trip," he said, placing a small bag in Stanley's hand. "Also, here is a French dictionary and a book light. Good luck, Stanley." "Thank you, Mr. Dart." Then Mr. Dart closed the crate tightly, and Stanley's adventure began. It was a little bumpy when Stanley was loaded onto the plane, but then the crate came to a rest. Soon he heard the roar of the airplane's engines, and everything tilted upward. The plane had taken off.

Stanley switched on the book light and opened the French dictionary. He heard his mother's voice in his head. "The three most important phrases in any language are hello, please, and thank you," she had once told him. "A polite visitor is a welcome one." Stanley turned to the Hs and found the word hello. He already knew that one: bonjour.

Please was harder. Stanley frowned. The French phrase seemed like a strange jumble of letters: s'il vous plait. Was it "sill vows plate"? But then he read that it was pronounced quite simply: "see voo play." "See voo play," Stanley repeated. And finally thank you. "Merci," Stanley said, stressing the "ee" sound on the end. "Bonjour, s'il vous plait, merci," Stanley said over and over, until he became very sleepy. Stanley awoke with a jolt as the plane touched down on the runway. Before long he heard French voices and was suddenly jostled around as the crate was lifted and carried off the plane. After a few minutes—and a bumpy ride—the crate was set down again. The top was pried off, and Stanley squinted in a sudden glare of morning light coming in through the window. He was in a bare room at the airport. Staring down at him was an officer in uniform. "Bonjour!" Stanley said brightly. The officer jumped. "The art, it talks!" He gasped, staggering backward.

Agent Lunette stepped in front of the man. "Bonjour, Monsieur Lambchop," Agent Lunette said. "Please excuse my associate. He has never seen a painting like you before." He shook Stanley's hand. Aunt Simone muscled Agent Lunette aside. "Stanley!" She bent down and kissed Stanley on