23. Thursday

CHAPTER 23 THURSDAY Things were back to normal on Thursday. Kipper stood in front of the school and made every kindergartner hand over their lunch money. "Things are gonna change around here," Kipper told the children. "Starting tomorrow, your taxes are going UP! You kids are gonna have to pay me four bucks a day, or it's WEDGIE TIME!"

Kipper's three friends watched the shakedowns from a distance. Finally, they approached Kipper nervously. "Dude," said Loogie. "What are you doing, man?" "I'm taking back what's rightfully MINE!" said Kipper. "But aren't you afraid of the ghost of Wedgie Magee?" asked Bugg. "There is no ghost of Wedgie Magee, you moron!" yelled Kipper. "It's all a setup! I figured it out last night! Somebody has been

picking my padlock and putting stuff in my locker!" "But who would do that?" asked Loogie. "The same person who has been writing those stupid texts on my phone!" said Kipper. "But it's all going to end today!" "How?" asked Loogie. "I got a NEW padlock!" said Kipper. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a brand-new Supa-Doopa Combo Lock 2000. "This thing is totally pick-proof," said Kipper.

The four fiends walked into the school and headed for the lockers. Kipper unlocked his old padlock and threw it into the garbage can, along with the key around his sweaty neck. Then Kipper put his all-new pick-proof combination padlock on his locker and clicked it shut. "Let's see somebody try to mess with me NOW!" Kipper sneered.

At noon, when the pizza delivery guy showed up with lunch for the kindergartners, Kipper stopped him in the hallway. "We'll take those pizzas," said Kipper. "But I'm supposed to deliver them to the kindergartners," said the delivery guy. "We'll do it for you," said Kipper. "Sorry," said the delivery guy, "but I've got strict instructions from Wedgie Magee to—" "Oh, Uncle Benny!" Kipper yelled.

Mr. Krupp came bounding up the hallway. Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! "What seems to be the problem, Kipper?" he asked. "This guy is delivering pizzas to the kindergartners," said Kipper. "Is he allowed to do that?" "Absolutely NOT," said Principal Krupp. "Those kids are on diets!" "See?" said Kipper to the delivery guy. "Now gimme those!"