20. Captain Underpants, That's Who

CHAPTER 20 CAPTAIN UNDERPANTS, THAT'S WHO As much as George and Harold hated to do it, they decided that it was time to send in Captain Underpants to save the day. George snapped his fingers. Suddenly, the terror and panic that Mr. Krupp had been experiencing completely vanished.

A wild, silly grin spread across his face as he leaped to his feet and ripped off his outer clothing and toupee. Mr. Krupp's transformation into Captain Underpants was almost complete. The only thing he was missing was a cape. "Gee," he said, "I sure wish I could find a red curtain with black dots on it." "Hey," said George as he pointed to the red curtain with black dots on it, "here's a red curtain with black dots on it." "What a remarkably unexpected coincidence," said Captain Underpants as he grabbed the latest in a series of convoluted plot devices and tied it around his neck.

By this time, Melvin had stomped his way out of the factory and into the downtown area, leaving behind a twisted path of mucus- coated destruction. Captain Underpants flew into the air, following the trail of terror until he was face-to-face with the snot-spewing cyborg. "I order you to stop," said Captain Underpants, "in the name of all that is Pre- Shrunk and Cottony!" Melvin did not listen.

Captain Underpants had no choice but to fight the boogery behemoth, but first he needed to save Miss Anthrope. Quickly, our hero flew to Edith's side, grabbed her hands, and pulled firmly. The slimy phlegm that covered Melvin's gigantic fist was strong and gluey, but it was no match for Wedgie Power.

Captain Underpants pulled and pulled until Miss Anthrope became completely dislodged with a noisy, wet, disgusting sound. (Note: Please feel free to make the noisy, wet, disgusting sound of your choice to emphasize the intense drama of this gripping paragraph.) "I'm free!" cried Miss Anthrope. "Let's get the heck out of here!"

Suddenly, the Bionic Booger Boy reached down and grabbed Captain Underpants by the cape. The monster held on tightly with his gigantic, gooey robotic fingers. "ACK!" cried Captain Underpants. "He's got my cape! He's got my cape!" "Well just untie it!" screamed Miss Anthrope. "Let's GO! Let's GO!" "But I —I can't fight crime without my cape!" cried Captain Underpants. "FORGET YOUR STUPID CAPE!" Edith screamed. "Just save me, you idiot!"