14. The Unnecessarily Disgusting Chapter

CHAPTER 14 THE UNNECESSARILY DISGUSTING CHAPTER NOTICE: The following chapter is extremely gross. To avoid nausea, projectile vomiting, or other gastrointestinal unpleasantries, please refrain from eating for at least one hour before reading this chapter. (You won't want to eat after reading it, let me assure you.)

第十四章不必要的恶心注意事项：下面这一章非常恶心。 为避免恶心、呕吐或其他肠胃不适，请在阅读本章前至少一小时内不要进食。 （我向你保证，你看完后不会想吃东西的。）

All of the fourth graders were cheering and petting Sulu as the classroom door slowly opened. A greenish, glistening behemoth entered the room, filling the air with the sounds of grinding metal gears and wet, gooey, bursting bubbles. Some of the girls screamed. Some of the boys did, too. "You guys are so immature!" said the horrible beast.

教室的门慢慢地打开了，所有的四年级学生都在欢呼和抚摸着苏璐。 一个绿油油、闪闪发光的庞然大物走进了房间，空气中充满了金属齿轮的研磨声和潮湿、粘稠、破裂的气泡声。 一些女孩尖叫起来。 一些男孩也这样做了。 “你们太不成熟了！”可怕的野兽说。

At once, the children recognized the terrifying creature that stood before them. "MELVIN?!!?" they cried. "Yes, it's me," gurgled the wet, jiggling monster angrily. His eyes and nose were dripping with warm, greenish, custard-like mucus. His robotic arms were caked with massive globs of crispy, shimmering snot. And as he turned to close the classroom door behind him, part of his hand came off on the doorknob. It oozed slowly down the door, leaving behind a chunky trail of moist excretion.

孩子们立刻认出了站在他们面前的那个可怕的家伙。 “梅尔文？！！？”“是的，是我。”湿漉漉的怪物生气地咯咯地说。 他的眼睛和鼻子淌着温热的、淡绿色的蛋奶冻似的黏液。 他的机械手臂上粘满了大块的酥脆、闪闪发光的鼻涕。 当他转身要关上教室的门时，他的一只手掉在了门把手上。 它慢慢地从门缝里渗出来，留下一大块潮湿的排泄物。

Melvin squished and sloshed as he jiggled over to his chair. Each gooey footstep coated the floor with a foamy trail of slime, and everything he touched became wet and encrusted with warm, bubbling, syrupy phlegm. When Melvin sat down, generous helpings of greenish, pudding-like goo slowly dribbled down the chair, collecting into creamy, gelatinous puddles beneath him. The puddles

梅尔文摇摇晃晃地坐到椅子上，浑身咯吱咯吱，溅起了水花。 每一个黏糊糊的脚步都在地板上留下一层泡沫状的黏液，他摸到的每样东西都变得湿漉漉的，上面结满了温暖的、冒泡的、糖浆般的痰。 当梅尔文坐下时，大量的绿色布丁状粘稠物慢慢地从椅子上流下来，在他身下聚集成奶油状的胶状水坑。 的水坑

themselves were slightly transparent and speckled with thick, shimmering nose hairs and dark red chunks of coagulated blood, which— "ALRIGHT ALREADY!" yelled George to the narrator. "Enough with the descriptions—you're making us all sick!" "Thank you, George," said Ms. Ribble. "Now, Melvin, why don't you tell us all what happened to you?"

它们都是微透明的，上面有厚厚的、闪闪发光的鼻毛和暗红色凝固的血块，这些——“好了！”乔治对讲述者喊道。 “别再描述了——你让我们都恶心了！”“谢谢你，乔治。” 博尔。“现在，梅尔文，你为什么不告诉我们你发生了什么事？”

"Well," said Melvin, "I tried to combine myself with a bionic robot last night, but I accidentally sneezed at the last second." "So you got combined with a robot—and boogers?" asked George. "Yeah," said Melvin. "But don't worry, I'm building a Separatron 1000, which will reverse the effects and turn me back into a boy again. It'll just take six months to finish."

“嗯，”梅尔文说，“昨晚我试着把自己和一个仿生机器人结合起来，但我在最后一秒不小心打了个喷嚏。” “这么说你和一个机器人还有鼻屎混在一起了？”乔治问。 “是的，”梅尔文说。“但别担心，我正在制造分离1000，它会逆转效果，把我变回男孩。 只需要六个月就能完成。”