2. The Evil Space Guys

CHAPTER 2 THE EVIL SPACE GUYS One dark, clear night in Piqua, Ohio, a flaming object was seen streaking across the quiet midnight sky. It shone brightly for a second or two, then fizzled out just above Jerome Horwitz Elementary School. Nobody gave it a second thought.

在俄亥俄州的皮夸市，一个漆黑、晴朗的夜晚，一个燃烧的物体划过寂静的午夜天空。 它明亮地闪耀了一两秒钟，然后在杰罗姆·霍维茨小学上空消失了。 没人再多想。

The next day, everything seemed pretty normal. Nobody noticed anything different about the school. Nobody paid any attention to the roof. And of course, nobody looked up and said, "Hey, what's that big spaceship thingy doing on the roof of the school?" Perhaps if they had, the horrible ordeal that followed might never have happened, and you wouldn't be sitting here reading about it right now. But they didn't, it did, and, well, here we are.

第二天，一切似乎都很正常。 没有人注意到学校有什么不同。 没有人注意屋顶。 当然，没有人抬起头来问：“嘿，那个在学校屋顶上的大飞船在做什么？”也许如果他们这么做了，那么随之而来的可怕的折磨就不会发生，你现在也不会坐在这里读这些。 但他们没有，它做到了，然后，好吧，我们在这里。

As we can all plainly see, there was a spaceship on top of the building. And inside that spaceship were three of the most evil, hideous, and merciless spacemen ever to set foot on the roof of a small midwestern elementary school. Their names were Zorx, Klax, and Jennifer. Their mission? To take over planet Earth.

我们都清楚地看到，大楼顶上有一艘宇宙飞船。 在那艘宇宙飞船里，有三个最邪恶、最丑陋、最无情的宇航员登上了中西部一所小小学的屋顶。 他们的名字是Zorx， Klax和Jennifer。 他们的任务吗?来接管地球。

"First," said Zorx, "we must find a way to infiltrate the school." "Then," said Klax, "we will turn all the children into giant, super-powered evil zombie nerds!" "Finally," said Jennifer, "we will use them to take over the world!" Zorx and Klax laughed and laughed. "Silence, you fools!" barked Jennifer: "If our plan is to work, we must wait until it is narratively convenient. In the meantime, we will watch their every move on our trinocloscope!"

“首先，”佐克斯说，“我们必须找到渗入学校的方法。” “然后，”克拉克斯说，“我们会把所有的孩子变成巨大的、有超能力的邪恶僵尸书呆子！”“最后，”珍妮弗说，“我们将用它们来统治世界！”Zorx和Klax笑了又笑。 “闭嘴，你们这些傻瓜！”詹妮弗吼道，“如果我们的计划要奏效，我们就必须等到叙述方便的时候。 同时，我们要用三轮望远镜观察他们的一举一动！”