2. Don't You Hate It When a KickballHits Uranus

CHAPTER 2 DON'T YOU HATE IT WHEN A KICKBALL HITS URANUS? Somewhere in the deepest, darkest reaches of our solar system, a red, rubber kickball was zooming through space. None of Earth's top scientists could explain where it had come from, or why it was racing toward Uranus, but it had been on its present course for the past five and a half books, and nothing could stop it.

你不讨厌踢球击中天王星吗？ 在太阳系最深处，最黑暗的地方，一个红色的橡胶足球在太空中疾驰。 地球上的顶尖科学家都无法解释它从何而来，也无法解释它为何冲向天王星，但在过去的五本书半里，它一直沿着目前的轨道运行，没有什么能阻止它。

The kickball sped closer and closer to a small cluster of porcelain monstrosities that lay together in a heap on the surface of the icy, ridiculously named planet. Behind them, guarding them all with a keen, observant eye, was a robotic sentinel known as the Incredible Robo-Plunger. Faster and faster the kickball whizzed toward them, until finally...

足球的速度越来越快，越来越接近一小簇瓷怪物，它们堆在一起，堆在这颗冰冷的、名字可笑的星球的表面。 在他们身后，有一个被称为“不可思议机器人柱塞”的机器人哨兵，用一双敏锐而敏锐的眼睛守护着他们。 球嗖嗖地朝他们飞来，越来越快，直到最后……

The force of the red, rubber ball knocked the head right off of the Incredible Robo-PIunger. The decapitated defender jutted forward slightly, as Photo-Atomic Trans-Somgobulating Yectofantriplutoniczanziptomistic juice drizzled out from its mangled neck hole and oozed slowly downward into the gaping mouth of the Turbo Toilet 2000.

红色橡胶球的力量把“不可思议的机器人”的头撞了下来。 被斩首的防守队员微微向前倾，光原子式反somgobulgating Yectofantriplutoniczanziptomistic的汁液从它残破的颈孔里滴了出来，慢慢地往下渗进了Turbo Toilet 2000的大嘴巴里。

This was unfortunate, because as any robot- ics engineer will tell you, it's very important to keep Photo-Atomic Trans-Somgobulating Yectofantriplutoniczanziptomistic juice as far away from evil robots as possible. You certainly don't want to get even a drop of it in their mouths, for it will only make them come to life and give them an unquenchable appetite for destruction. Which, sadly, is exactly what happened that bleak night on the terribly gassy surface of Uranus.

这是不幸的，因为正如任何机器人工程师都会告诉你的那样，让光原子跨somgobulating yetofantrplutoniczanziptomistic juice离邪恶的机器人尽可能远是非常重要的。 你们一滴也不要入他们的口中，因为这只会使他们活过来，并且使他们欲求灭亡。 不幸的是，这正是那个寒冷的夜晚在天王星可怕的气体表面发生的事情。

The Turbo Toilet 2000's bulbous, bloodshot eyes smacked open and wobbled around wildly. His massive left arm creaked up and rubbed the painful, throbbing side of his porcelain lid. "Where the heck am I?" he said, looking around at his fallen allies. Clumsily, he squeaked to his feet, dusted himself off, and beheld the headless mess that once was the Incredible Robo-Plunger. Then it all came back to him. The battle. The defeat. The humiliation.

涡轮马桶2000的球根状、充血的眼睛啪的一声睁开，疯狂地晃来晃去。 他那粗壮的左臂嘎吱嘎吱地伸了起来，摩擦着瓷盖那疼痛而悸动的一侧。 “我到底在哪儿？”他环顾四周，看着倒下的盟友，问道。 他笨拙地尖叫着站了起来，掸去身上的灰尘，看到了曾经是不可思议的机器活塞的无头的混乱。 然后他又想起来了。 这场战斗。的失败。的羞辱。

It wasn't long before the Turbo Toilet 2000 had pieced together every single event that had brought him and his army of Talking Toilets to this frozen, frustrating fate. "I must retaliate," he said, clenching his razor-sharp porcelain teeth together tightly. "I must avenge my fallen allies!"

没过多久，2000版的涡轮马桶就把导致他和他的会说话的马桶军团陷入这种冰冷、令人沮丧的命运的每一个事件拼凑在一起。 “我必须报复，”他说，把他那锋利的瓷牙紧紧地咬在一起。 “我必须为我死去的盟友报仇！”