16. Super-Secret Test Day

CHAPTER 16 SUPER—SECRET TEST DAY The next day when George and Harold arrived at school, Mr. Krupp was OVERJOYED to see them. He met them at the front door, shook their hands enthusiastically, and gave them both big, sweaty hugs. "This can't be good," George said. "You're wrong," said Mr. Krupp. "It's the BEST DAY EVER! It's the day I've been waiting for since I met you two horrible people. Let's all go to my office, shall we? I've got refreshments!"

第十六章超级秘密考试日第二天，当乔治和哈罗德来到学校时，克虏伯先生看到他们欣喜若狂。 他在前门迎接他们，热情地与他们握手，并给了他们两个大大的、汗流浃背的拥抱。 “这不可能是好事，”乔治说。 “你错了，”克虏伯先生说。 “这是最棒的一天！”自从我遇到你们两个可怕的人，我就一直在等待这一天。 大家都去我办公室，好吗？ 我有点心！”

As they walked down the long hallway toward Mr. Krupp's office, several teachers patted Mr. Krupp on the back and congratulated him. The entire school staff seemed elated. "We're doomed," said Harold.

当他们沿着长长的走廊走向克虏伯的办公室时，几位老师拍了拍克虏伯的背，向他表示祝贺。 全校教职工似乎都很高兴。 “我们完蛋了。”哈罗德说。

When they finally got to Mr. Krupp's office, he plopped down into his chair and spun around a few times, giggling with glee. After a few minutes, George started to become impatient. "I thought you said there were going to be refreshments," George said. "NOT FOR YOU!!!" shouted Mr. Krupp angrily, as he slammed his fist on his desk. He opened his drawer, pulled out a warm diet soda, and popped it open. Then he leaned back in his chair and sipped loudly as he chuckled to himself. "I just want to soak this moment in," he said with delight, as fizzy, brown phosphoric acid dribbled down his chins.

当他们终于来到克虏伯的办公室时，他扑通一声坐在椅子上，转了几圈，开心地咯咯笑着。 几分钟后，乔治开始不耐烦了。 “我记得你说过会有点心的，”乔治说。 “不是给你的！！”克虏伯先生愤怒地喊道，他的拳头重重地砸在桌子上。 他打开抽屉，拿出一杯温热的无糖汽水，把它打开。 然后他靠在椅背上，一边大声啜饮，一边暗自发笑。 “我只想沉浸在这一刻，”他高兴地说，嘶嘶作响的棕色磷酸顺着他的下巴流下来。

"You boys have REALLY messed up this time." Mr. Krupp laughed. "You skipped school on Super-Secret Test Day!" "Super-Secret Test Day?" said Harold. "What does that mean?" "I thought you'd never ask," Mr. Krupp said gleefully. "You see, I've been looking for a way to separate you two kids for years now, but I never figured out how to do it until yesterday. Then it came to me in a flash of inspiration. SUPER-SECRET TEST DAY!" "What's so secret about it?" asked George. "You should be asking, 'What's so SUPER about it?'" said Mr. Krupp joyfully. "Because it just might be the crowning achievement of my entire career!"

“你们这些男孩子这次真是搞砸了。” 克虏伯笑了。“你在超级秘密考试那天逃课了！”“超级秘密考试日？”哈罗德问。 “这是什么意思？”“我以为你永远不会问，”克虏伯先生高兴地说。 “你看，多年来我一直在想办法把你们两个孩子分开，但直到昨天我才想出办法。 然后我灵光一闪，想到了这个主意。 超级秘密考试日！”“这有什么秘密？”乔治问。 “你应该问，‘它有什么超级的？’”克虏伯先生高兴地说。 “因为这可能是我整个职业生涯中最高的成就！”

George and Harold looked at each other nervously. Suddenly, the door opened and the school's math teacher, Miss Calculator, entered the room. She sneered down at George and Harold and poked her tongue out at them as she walked by. "Here are the figures you asked for," she said, handing Mr. Krupp a large manila envelope. "Thanks, Anita," Mr. Krupp said. He smelled the envelope like he was admiring the aroma of a gourmet meal. "It's a real shame you boys missed school yesterday," Mr. Krupp said. "Your teachers hated to do it, but they had to give you both ZEROES on all of your tests!!!"

乔治和哈罗德紧张地面面相觑。 突然，门开了，学校的数学老师，计算器小姐，走了进来。 她朝乔治和哈罗德冷笑了一声，走过时还朝他们吐了吐舌头。 “这是你要的数字，”她说着，递给克虏伯先生一个大马尼拉信封。 “谢谢你，安妮塔，”克虏伯说。 他闻着信封，就像在欣赏美食的香味。 “你们昨天没去上学真是太遗憾了，”克虏伯先生说。 “你们的老师讨厌这么做，但他们不得不在你们所有的考试中给你们两个零分！！”

"But we studied really hard," said Harold. "Can't we take makeup tests?" "No, no, no, no, no," Mr. Krupp said, grinning evilly from ear to ear. "There will be no makeup tests!" "Don't worry, Harold," said George. "We'll do really good on our final exams this year! We can bring our grades back up." "Final exams have been canceled for this year," said Mr. Krupp cheerfully. "Isn't that wonderful news? You and all your classmates will get seven more weeks of school with no homework, no quizzes, and no studying. Your grades for the whole school year have already been calculated." "Oh, NO," said George. "We're—we're going to flunk the fourth grade?!!?"

“但是我们学习真的很努力。”哈罗德说。 “我们不能补考吗？”“不，不，不，不，不，”克虏伯说，邪恶地笑得合不拢嘴。 “不会有补考！”“别担心，哈罗德。”乔治说。 “我们今年的期末考试一定会考得很好！”我们可以把成绩拉上来。” “今年的期末考试取消了，”克虏伯先生高兴地说。 “这不是好消息吗？” 你和你所有的同学将在学校多待七周没有作业，没有测验，也没有学习。 你整个学年的成绩已经计算出来了。” “哦，不，”乔治说。“我们——我们四年级要挂科了？！！ ！？”