2. Let's Get Serious, Folks!

CHAPTER 2 LET'S GET SERIOUS, FOLKS! Did you ever notice how grown-ups hate it when kids are having fun? Seriously, when was the last time you were doing something fun and some adult came over and made you stop? If you're like most kids, you're probably reading this very book because some adult wanted you to quit playing video games or watching TV. If you don't believe me, try this experiment: Grab a few of your friends, go into the corner of a room, and start goofing around. Make some noise! Start laughing and cheering and maybe shout out a "Woo-hoo!" or two. It's been scientifically proven that 89.4 percent of all grown-ups will drop whatever they're doing and rush over to put a stop to whatever "nonsense" you're up to.

第二章让我们严肃起来，伙计们！你有没有注意到大人有多讨厌孩子们玩得开心？ 说真的，上次你在做一些有趣的事然后有个成年人过来阻止你是什么时候？ 如果你和大多数孩子一样，你读这本书可能是因为某个大人希望你不要再玩电子游戏或看电视了。 如果你不相信我，试试这个实验：找上你的几个朋友，走到一个房间的角落里，开始闲逛。 发出点声音！开始大笑和欢呼，也许喊出一两个“哇嗬！” 科学证明，89.4%的成年人会放下手头的事情，冲过去制止你正在做的任何“胡说八道”。

You have to wonder, why are most grown-ups like this? Weren't they ever kids themselves? Didn't they enjoy laughing and cheering and goofing around when they were young? If so, when did they stop? And why? Now, I certainly can't speak for all adults, but I'm going to anyway. I think it's a lot easier for adults to stomp out someone else's fun than it is for them to reflect on their own lives and figure out where it all went so miserably wrong. It's just too depressing for grown-ups to ponder all the decades of compromises, failures, laziness, fear, and regrettable choices that slowly transformed them from running, jumping, laughing, fun-loving kids into grumpy,

你会想，为什么大多数成年人都这样？ 他们自己也曾经是孩子吗？ 他们年轻的时候不喜欢欢笑、欢呼和嬉闹吗？ 如果有，他们是什么时候停止的？ ,为什么?现在，我当然不能代表所有成年人，但我还是要这么做。 我认为，对成年人来说，践踏别人的乐趣要比反思自己的生活并弄清楚哪里出了这么糟糕的问题容易得多。 对成年人来说，几十年来的妥协、失败、懒惰、恐惧和遗憾的选择，慢慢地把他们从跑、跳、笑、爱玩的孩子变成了脾气暴躁、

complaining, calorie-counting, easily offended, peace-and-quiet-demanding grouches. In other words, it's harder to look within yourself than it is to shout, "HEY, YOU KIDS, CUT THAT OUT!" Keeping this in mind, you might not want to smile or laugh while reading this book. And when you get to the Flip-E-Rama parts, I suggest you flip with a bored, disinterested look on your face or some adult will probably take this book away from you and make you read Sarah, Plain and Tall instead. Don't say I didn't warn you.

抱怨，计算卡路里，容易被冒犯，要求和平和安静的牢骚。 换句话说，审视自己比大喊“嘿，孩子们，别那样！”更难。记住这一点，你可能不想在阅读这本书时微笑或大笑。 当你读到翻页部分时，我建议你带着一副无聊、不感兴趣的表情翻页，否则某个成年人可能会把这本书从你身边拿走，让你去读《平凡而高大的莎拉》。 别说我没警告过你。