07-STILTON, OLD PAL

STILTON, OLD PAL ... I was miserable. Then I noticed the light blinking on my answering machine. I raced over to it. Maybe I had some happy messages. Maybe my favorite nephew had called. Or perhaps my sweet Granny Onewhisker. Or maybe I'd won that free vacation to the Hamster Islands. I'd bought a raffle ticket just last week at the Shop and Nibble, Maybe I was about to get lucky. Excited, I pressed the button on my machine, But I was wrong about the messages. They weren't happy at all. They were horrifying! The first message was from some rodent named Stuart Swingtail. He said he was a

singer at the SLEAZY FUR DANCE FACTORY! I frowned. I'd never been there. Only sewer rats hung out at the Sleazy Fur. So what was this Swingtail mouse calling me for? "Hey, Stilton, old pal! You were really kicking up those paws Saturday night!" he squeaked. "By the way, you owe me fifty smackers. Don't forget, pal. See you next week at the factory!" The second message was from Dr. Edward S. Smugrat III. He was a very rich and STUCK-UP mouse. He had the best golf clubs, the best golf shoes, and the best golf shirts. Still, he was an awful golfer. I guess it's true what they say, clothes do not make the mouse.

"Stilton! What do you think you are twying to pull?" Smugrat shrieked. "I know you swiped my Wat King cwedit card! I just got the bill for your dinner with fifty-seven fwiends at the golf club. You will be heawing fwom my lawyer!" After that came a message from a Mr. Van Der Raten. He owned an antiques shop called Treasured Crumbs. The antiques in his place were more expensive than my cousin Brainypaw's college tuition! Still, Mr. Van Der Raten said that I had purchased a solid-gold cheese holder just yesterday. "I gave you the cheese holder on good faith," he said. "I know you are a respectable newspapemouse. But you will need to come in to settle your bill."

Finally, there was a message from my sister's friend Swissita Tendcrfur. "Geronimo, what was up with you yesterday?" she sniffed. "I know you saw me at the movies. I was sitting two seats away. Why didn't you say hello? you were so rude!" I slumped onto my couch. Could this day get any worse? I felt like a young mouse in Squeaking School who'd just been scolded by all of my teachers. I didn't know what to make of it. fclnef. Ue-be-live-a-ble!