11 Ch11-Silent Lunch

Chapter 11 Silent Lunch It was the next day. The green traffic light was on in the vomitorium. "How was Andrea's party, A.J.?" Ryan asked me, poking Michael in the side and giggling. "It was cool," I lied. "There was a rock climbing wall and a half pipe for skate-

boarding. At the end I got a goody bag, and there was a remote control car in it." No way I was going to tell them I sat around drinking tea with Andrea and her friends. While we were talking. I was playing with my fork and spoon on the table. And when I put my spoon across my fork, the most amazing thing in the history of the world happened. "I figured it out!" I shouted. "Figured what out?" asked Ryan and Michael. "I just figured out how the Egyptians picked up those big rocks to build the pyramids!"

"How?" "Look," I said, scooping up some of Ryan's carrots and peas with my spoon. "Imagine these peas and carrots are big rocks. Nobody could pick one up. But if they could slide them onto a big scoop like this, and put the scoop across a big fork like this, it would be easier to pick up." I put the spoonful of carrots and peas across my fork, like the spoon and fork were a little seesaw. "You're right!" Michael said, smashing his fist down on the table. The only problem was, Michael's fist missed the table and hit the long end of

the spoon instead. The peas and carrots went flying up in the air. They hit the ceiling and then they stuck up there! The ceiling was splotched with peas and carrots. It was the coolest thing in the history of the world! You should have been there! Me and Ryan and Michael looked up at the ceiling. We were excited that I had solved the mystery of the pyramids. That's when Miss I Know Everything came over to our table. She looked all mad. "A.J.," Andrea said, "you ruined my birthday party!" "I did not!"

"Did too!" We went back and forth like that a few more times, but then something totally amazing happened. Remember those peas and carrots that were stuck to the ceiling? Well! I guess they didn't stick very well, because they started falling down— on Andrea's head! "Eeeeeek!" Andrea screamed. "I can't see! I've got carrots in my eyes!" "That's okay, Andrea," I said. "Carrots are good for your eyes! Ryan and Michael thought that was hilarious, but I guess Andrea didn't. She picked up Michael's bowl of spaghetti and dumped it over my head.

Nobody dumps spaghetti over my head and gets away with it. I picked up Ryan's bowl of macaroni and cheese and pushed it in Andrea's face. "Food fight! Food fight!" everybody started chanting. I'm not exactly sure what happened next. Things sort of went out of control. Kids started shout- ing and throwing stuff at each other. Mr. Klutz turned on the red light, but it didn't help. "This is a silent lunch!" Mr. Klutz