2 Ch2-Weird People

Chapter 2 Weird People I grabbed a lunch table in the vomitorium with the guys. Andrea and some of the girls sat at the next table. Michael, who never ties his shoes, put straws in his nostrils and said he was a walrus. Neil, who we call the nude kid even though he wears clothes, put Tater Tots over his eyeballs. Ryan balanced his lunch box on his head. "Ugh, broccoli!" I said as I opened my lunch bag. "I'm not eating food that looks like a tree."

第2章古怪的人我和一群人在食堂里抢了一张午餐桌。 安德里亚和一些女孩坐在邻桌。 迈克尔从不系鞋带，他把吸管塞进鼻孔，说自己是海象。 尼尔，我们管他叫裸体小孩，尽管他穿着衣服，把土豆包在眼球上。 赖安把他的午餐盒顶在头上。 “哎,西兰花!”我一边说一边打开午餐袋。 “我不吃长得像树的食物。”

"I'll eat it," said Ryan, who will eat anything. Ryan even eats stuff that isn't food. He's weird. "I don't want to go to a natural history museum," Michael said. "What a snore!" I told the guys. "I bet they're going to tell us the history of rocks." "Hey, rocks are cool," said Neil the nude kid. "I have a rock collection at home." "You collect rocks?" I asked Neil. "Why collect something that's just lying around on the ground? You might as well collect air." "My uncle collects air," Ryan said. "Whenever he goes on a trip, he brings an empty bottle along. He's got bottles of air from all over the world." "Your uncle is weird," I told Ryan. "One time he couldn't find a bathroom and had to use one of his bottles," Ryan added. "Ew, gross. See? I told you he was weird," I said. That's when Little Miss I-Know-Everything opened her big mouth at the next table. "Natural history isn't just about rocks and air, dumbheads!" she said. "It's about all the objects in nature, like plants and animals." "So is your face," I told Andrea.

“我要吃它，”瑞安说，他什么都吃。 瑞恩甚至吃非食物的东西。 他很奇怪。“我不想去自然历史博物馆，”迈克尔说。 “鼾声太大了!”我告诉他们了。 “我打赌他们会告诉我们岩石的历史。” “嘿，石头很酷，”裸体男孩尼尔说。 “我家里有一个岩石收藏。” “你收集石头?”我问尼尔。 “为什么要收集躺在地上的东西?” 你还是收集空气吧。” “我叔叔收集空气，”瑞恩说。 “每当他去旅行，他总是带着一个空瓶子。 他有来自世界各地的空气瓶。” “你叔叔很奇怪，”我告诉瑞安。 “有一次他找不到洗手间，不得不用他的一个瓶子，”瑞安补充说。 “电子战,恶心。看到了吗?我告诉过你他很奇怪，”我说。 就在这时，邻桌的“无所不知”小姐张开了她的大嘴。 “博物学不只是关于岩石和空气，笨蛋!”她说。 “它是关于自然界中的所有物体，比如植物和动物。” “你的脸也是，”我告诉安德里亚。

Any time anybody says something mean to you, just say "So is your face." That's the first rule of being a kid. I wish some plants and animals would fall on Andrea's head. Like a 400 pound piece of broccoli, and a hippopotamus.

如果有人对你说了刻薄的话，就说“你的脸也是”。 这是当孩子的第一准则。 我希望一些植物和动物能砸到安德里亚的头上。 比如一块400磅重的西兰花，还有一头河马。