9 Ch9-The Truth About Mrs. Yonkers

Chapter 9 The Truth About Mrs. Yonkers The next day we were sitting around the vomitorium eating lunch when an announcement came over the loudspeaker. "Mrs. Yonkers is absent today," said Mrs. Patty. "All computer classes are canceled." Bummer in the summer! At the next table, the girls were talking about silly stuff, like what dress they should wear to somebody's birthday party and how many rubber bands they should put in their hair. We boys had more important things to talk about. "I can hang a spoon from my nose," Ryan said. "No way," I said. Ryan breathed on his spoon. Then he put the spoon on his nose and it hung there! It was the most amazing thing in the history of the world. Ryan taught me and Michael and Neil the nude kid how to hang spoons from our noses. After that we had a spoon-hanging contest. Ryan won, because he was able to hang four spoons from his face at the same time. He should be in the gifted and talented program like me.

第9章扬克斯太太的真相第二天，我们正围坐在大礼堂里吃午饭，扩音器里传来一则通告。 “扬克斯太太今天没来，”帕蒂太太说。 “所有的计算机课都取消了。” 夏天的流浪者!在邻桌，女孩们在谈论一些愚蠢的事情，比如她们应该穿什么衣服去参加别人的生日聚会，应该在头发上扎几根橡皮筋。 我们男孩子有更重要的事要谈。 “我可以把勺子挂在鼻子上，”瑞恩说。 “不可能，”我说。赖安对着勺子呼气。 然后他把勺子放在鼻子上，它就挂在那里了!这是世界历史上最令人惊奇的事情。 瑞安教我，迈克尔还有那个裸男尼尔怎么把勺子挂在鼻子上。 在那之后，我们进行了一场挂勺比赛。 瑞恩赢了，因为他可以同时把四个勺子挂在脸上。 他应该像我一样参加天才班。

I opened the lunch bag that my mom packed. Milk. A bag of peanuts. An apple. Carrot sticks. Ugh! I hate healthy food. I can't believe we're supposed to eat fruits and vegetables. They grow out of the dirt! That's disgusting! I looked over at the girls' table. "Andrea," said Emily, "do you want to trade your stir-fried veggies and fruit kabobs for my tofu nuggets?" "No thanks," Andrea replied. "I'm not hungry." Andrea looked all sad, like her dog died or something. "What's the matter with you?" I asked. "Did your dog die or something?" "I'm worried about Mrs. Yonkers," Andrea said. "What about her?" asked Michael. "She's under so much pressure," Andrea said. "My mother is a psychologist. She says that when people are under a lot of pressure, they could have a nervous breakdown." "Maybe Mrs. Yonkers isn't a computer teacher at all," I suggested. "Did you ever think of that?" "What do you mean?" asked Emily.

我打开妈妈装的午餐袋。 牛奶。一袋花生。一个苹果。 胡萝卜条。啊!我讨厌健康食品。 我真不敢相信我们应该吃水果和蔬菜。 它们是从泥土里长出来的!太恶心了!我看了看女孩们的桌子。 “安德里亚，”艾米丽说，“你想把你的炒蔬菜和水果串换成我的豆腐块吗?”“不，谢谢，”安德里亚回答。 “我不饿。”安德里亚看起来很伤心，好像她的狗死了似的。 “你怎么啦?”我问。 “你的狗死了还是怎么了?”“我很担心扬克斯太太，”安德烈说。 “她怎么了?”迈克尔问。 “她的压力太大了，”安德里亚说。 “我妈妈是一名心理学家。 她说，当人们承受很大压力时，他们可能会精神崩溃。” “也许扬克斯夫人根本就不是计算机老师，”我建议道。 “你想过吗?”“你是什么意思?”爱米丽问。

"Well, maybe she's just pretending to be a computer teacher." "Yeah," said Ryan, "Maybe Mrs. Yonkers is an evil genius who kidnaps computer teachers and forces them to hack into government computer networks. Stuff like that happens all the time, you know." "It does?" Emily asked. "Stop trying to scare Emily," said Andrea. "Sure it does," Michael said. "Maybe Mrs. Yonkers is planning to program all the computers in the world to crash at the same time." "Yeah," said Neil the nude kid, "and maybe she tied up our real computer teacher in the secret dungeon in the basement." "I think they moved the secret dungeon up to the third floor," Ryan said. "I'll bet Mrs. Yonkers took apart a laser printer, and she's going to torture our real computer teacher with laser beams," I added. "I saw that in a movie once." "We've got to do something!" Emily shouted. Then she went running out of the vomitorium. Emily is weird.

“嗯，也许她只是假装是个电脑老师。” “是啊，”瑞恩说，“也许扬克斯夫人是个邪恶的天才，她绑架计算机教师，强迫他们侵入政府的计算机网络。 你知道，这样的事情经常发生。” “它?”艾米丽问。“别吓唬艾米丽了，”安德烈说。 “当然有，”迈克尔说。 “也许扬克斯太太正计划让世界上所有的电脑同时崩溃。” “是啊，”裸体男孩尼尔说，“也许她把我们真正的电脑老师绑在地下室的秘密地牢里。” “我想他们把秘密地牢搬到了三楼，”瑞恩说。 “我敢打赌，扬克斯太太拆开了一台激光打印机，她要用激光束折磨我们真正的计算机老师，”我补充道。 “我曾经在一部电影里看到过。” “我们必须做点什么!”艾米丽喊道。 然后她跑出了体育馆。 艾米丽很奇怪。