11 Ch11-Send in the Clones

Chapter 11 Send in the Clones Keeping secrets is hard. I wanted to tell my parents about the Junk Food Transformer. I wanted to tell my friend Billy who lives around the corner. I wanted to tell somebody. But I didn't. My lips were sealed. (But not with glue or anything. That would be weird.) The next morning Mrs. Patty made an announcement over the loudspeaker. "Mrs. Yonkers is absent today, but please go to the computer lab at your regularly scheduled time." That was weird. If Mrs. Yonkers was absent, who would be our computer teacher? All day long we wondered. Finally, it was time for computer class. We rushed down the hall. We opened the door of the computer lab. And you'll never believe in a million hundred years who was standing there. It was a robot! "SIT DOWN," the robot commanded in a computery voice. "PAY ATTENTION."

第十一章派遣克隆人保守秘密是件难事。 我想告诉我父母关于垃圾食品变形金刚的事。 我想告诉住在街角的朋友比利。 我想告诉别人。 但我没有。我守口如瓶。 (但不是用胶水或其他东西。 那会很奇怪。)第二天早上，帕蒂夫人通过扩音器宣布了一件事。 “扬克斯夫人今天缺席，但请按规定的时间去电脑室。” 这很奇怪。如果扬克斯夫人缺席，谁会是我们的计算机老师? 一整天我们都在想。最后，是上计算机课的时间了。 我们冲过大厅。我们打开了电脑室的门。 你永远也不会相信是谁站在那里。 那是一个机器人!“坐下，”机器人用计算机的声音命令道。 “注意”。

The robot looked a lot like Mrs. Yonkers. It even wore a NERDS R COOL T-shirt and a fake cheese head. "MRS. YONKERS IS NOT FEELING WELL," the robot said. "I AM MRS. ROBO-YONKERS. I WILL BE YOUR TEACHER TODAY." Wow! Mrs. Yonkers built her own robot substitute teacher! Cool! We used to have a sub named Ms. Todd. But then she tried to murder Miss Daisy and take her job. Ms. Todd was odd. "Remember Mrs. Yonkers told us that she had so much work, she wished she could clone herself?" Andrea said as we sat down. "Well, I guess she figured out how to do it." Clones are cool. My friend Billy who lives around the corner told me that scientists have cloned sheep, cats, and cows. But nobody ever cloned a person before.

这个机器人看起来很像扬克斯太太。 它甚至穿着NERDS R COOL的t恤和一个假奶酪头。 “扬克斯太太不舒服，”机器人说。 “我是机器人扬克斯太太。今天我是你们的老师。” 哇!扬克斯夫人造了她自己的机器人代课老师!太酷了!我们以前有一艘潜艇叫。 托德。但后来她试图谋杀黛西小姐，抢走她的工作。 托德很奇怪。“还记得扬克斯太太告诉我们，她有那么多工作要做，她希望能克隆自己吗?”我们坐下时，安德里亚说。 “嗯，我猜她知道怎么做了。” 克隆很酷。我的朋友比利住在街角，他告诉我科学家已经克隆了羊、猫和牛。 但之前还没有人克隆过人类。

"STOP TALKING," said Mrs. Robo-YOnkers. "FOLD YOUR FEET. KEEP YOUR HANDS ON THE FLOOR." She sounded almost like a real teacher! "Mrs. Robo-Yonkers," I said. "I have a question." "STATE YOUR QUESTION," said Mrs. Robo-Yonkers. "Firemen banana stomach pitchfork?" I asked. "I DO NOT UNDERSTAND THE QUESTION," said Mrs. Robo-Yonkers. "PLEASE REPEAT THE QUESTION." "Football my orange telephone?" I asked. "DOES NOT COMPUTE," said Mrs. Robo-Yonkers. "PLEASE REPEAT." "Watermelon lawn chair atomic bicycle?" I asked. "What are you doing, Arlo?" asked Andrea. "Computers aren't very good at understanding language," I said. "I'm yanking her chain. That's what you're supposed to do with substitute teachers. It's the first rule of being a kid." "I DO NOT UNDERSTAND," said Mrs. Robo-Yonkers. "Monster my upside down moon machine?" I asked. "Stop it, Arlo!" Andrea said. "You're going to get us in trouble!" But it was too late. We were already in trouble. Mrs. Robo-Yonkers started shaking and twitching. "SYSTEM ERROR! SYSTEM ERROR! SYSTEM ERROR!" she droned. Smoke was coming out of her head, and sparks were shooting out of her neck. She started turning around in circles and bumping into desks.

“别说了，”罗博-扬克斯太太说。 把你的脚叠起来。把手放在地板上。” 她听起来几乎像个真正的老师!“夫人。 机器人扬克斯，”我说。“我有一个问题。” “说出你的问题，”罗博-扬克斯太太说。 “消防员香蕉胃干草叉?”我问。 “我不明白这个问题，”罗博-扬克斯太太说。 “请重复一下问题。” “足球，我的橙色电话?”我问。 “不算数，”罗博-扬克斯太太说。 “请重复。”“西瓜草坪椅原子自行车?”我问。 “你在干什么，阿乐?”安德烈问。 “电脑不擅长理解语言，”我说。 “我在拉她的链子。这就是代课老师该做的。 这是做孩子的第一准则。” “我不明白，”罗博-扬克斯太太说。 “怪物我的倒挂月亮机?”我问。 “住手，阿乐!”安德里亚说。 “你会给我们带来麻烦的!”但为时已晚。 我们已经有麻烦了。 机器人扬克斯太太开始颤抖和抽搐。 “系统错误!系统错误!系统错误!” 烟雾从她的头上冒出来，火花从她的脖子上射出。 她开始转圈，撞到桌子上。

"I think she blew a circuit!" said Michael. Mrs. Robo-Yonkers was rolling crazily around the computer lab, crashing into everything in her path. Kids were diving out of the way. "Run for your lives!" shouted Neil the nude kid. "I'll get Mr. Klutz!" yelled Andrea as she ran out of the lab. Mrs. Robo-Yonkers was bouncing around the computer lab like a pinball. She was out of control. Finally, Mr. Klutz came running in. "What's wrong?" he yelled. "Mrs. Robo-Yonkers has gone berserk!" I told him. "Leave it to me," Mr. Klutz said. ("I used to work with computers in my younger days. Where does Mrs. Yonkers keep the robot's remote control?" "In a remote location," I said. "SYSTEM ERROR! SYSTEM ERROR! SYSTEM ERROR!"

“我想她的电路坏了!”迈克尔说。 机器人扬克斯太太在计算机实验室里疯狂地滚来滚去，遇到什么东西就撞什么东西。 孩子们纷纷闪开。 “逃命!”裸体小孩尼尔喊道。 “我去找克鲁茨先生!”安德里亚跑出实验室时喊道。 机器人扬克斯太太像弹球一样在电脑室里跳来跳去。 她失去了控制。最后，克鲁茨先生跑了进来。 “怎么了?”他喊道。 “机器人-扬克斯太太疯了!”我告诉了他。 “交给我吧，”克鲁茨说。 (“我年轻的时候曾经和电脑打交道。 扬克斯太太把机器人的遥控器放在哪儿了?”“在一个偏僻的地方，”我说。 “系统错误!系统错误!系统错误!”

As Mrs. Robo-Yonkers spun around in circles, one of her arms hit Emily before she could duck out of the way. "Owwww! My head!" Emily was on the floor, freaking out as usual. "Call Mrs. Cooney!" shouted Mr. Klutz. "Tell her to bring her first-aid kit!" Mrs. Robo-Yonkers was running around the computer lab. Mr. Klutz was running around the computer lab. All of us kids were running around the computer lab. It was a lot like that scene in the movie King Kong when Kong broke his chains and went running around the streets of New York. Everybody was going crazy. And you'll never believe who showed up at that very moment. It was Dr. Carbles, the president of the Board of Education! Oh, snap! "Klutz!" Dr. Carbles shouted. "What's the meaning of this?" "Nothing to worry about, sir," Mr. Klutz said, as Mrs. Robo-Yonkers crashed into the whiteboard. "Why is it that every time I visit this school, the students are running around like lunatics?" demanded Dr. Carbles. "These kids are obviously hopped up on junk food!"

机器人-扬克斯太太在原地打转，她还没来得及躲开，一只胳膊就打在了艾米丽身上。 “扯!我的头!”艾米丽躺在地板上，像往常一样吓坏了。 “叫库尼太太来!”克鲁茨先生喊道。 “告诉她带上急救箱!”机器人扬克斯太太在计算机实验室里跑来跑去。 克鲁茨先生在电脑室里跑来跑去。 我们所有的孩子都在电脑室里跑来跑去。 这很像电影《金刚》中金刚挣断链子在纽约街头奔跑的场景。 每个人都疯了。 你绝对不会相信谁在那一刻出现了。 是卡伯斯博士，教育委员会主席!哦,提前!“笨蛋!”博士。 Carbles喊道。“这是什么意思?”“没什么好担心的，先生，”克鲁茨说，这时机器人-扬克斯太太撞到了白板上。 “为什么每次我参观这所学校，学生们都像疯子一样跑来跑去?” Carbles。“这些孩子显然是吃了垃圾食品才兴奋起来的!”

"Oh no, sir!" said Mr. Klutz. "We got rid of all the junk food. We even put in a junk food detector at the front door." At that very moment, Mrs. Robo-Yonkers rammed into the closet where we hid all the candy the day before. Twinkies and Twix and Jolly Ranchers and Skittles and Chuckles went flying all over the place. "Klutz!" yelled Dr. Carbles. "What's the meaning of this? I thought you got rid of all the junk food." "We did!" Mr. Klutz said. "Somebody get Mrs. Yonkers on the phone!" That's when Mrs. Cooney (who is beautiful) came running in with her firstaid kit. She took out her cell phone and started dialing frantically. Mrs. Robo-Yonkers was chasing Dr. Carbles around the computer lab. It was just like in that King Kong movie. Mrs. Robo-Yonkers was bonkers!

“哦，不，先生!”克鲁茨先生说。 “我们扔掉了所有的垃圾食品。 我们甚至在前门安装了一个垃圾食品探测器。” 就在那一刻，机器人扬克斯太太冲进了我们前一天藏糖果的壁橱。 Twinkies、Twix、Jolly Ranchers、Skittles和Chuckles到处飞。 “笨手笨脚的!” “这是什么意思?” 我还以为你把垃圾食品都扔掉了呢。” “我们做的!”克鲁茨说。“谁来给扬克斯太太打电话!”就在这时，库尼太太(她很漂亮)拿着急救箱跑了进来。 她拿出手机，开始疯狂地拨号。 机械人-扬克斯太太在追博士。 在计算机实验室闲逛。 就像金刚电影里演的那样。 机器人-扬克斯太太是个疯子!