5. Talking It Over

5 Talking It Over I did what Mr. Scary said. I stayed in my seat. And I thought very hard about what just happened here. First, I tapped on my chin. Then I scratched my head. And I strained and strained my brain. But nothing actually came to me. Finally, I tapped on Herbert. "Okay. I give up. What just happened here?" I asked. "Why is Mr. Scary so mad at us?" Herb did a shrug. "I'm not really sure," he said. "We dived in

a pile of money. Who wouldn't do that?" May jumped up and pointed to herself. "I wouldn't, that's who!" she said. "I did not dive in the money pile. Instead, I walked around the edges with dignity. And I picked up whatever money squeezed out." Herb looked curious at her. "How much money squeezed out?" May stood there a minute. "None," she said. "Exactly," said Herb. May sat back down. Herb looked at the board and sighed. "I have a feeling that Mr. Scary really hates our Thankful List." May threw her head back. "Of course he hates our Thankful List!" she said. "Just look how stupid it is!" She hurried to the board. And she read each item out loud. 1. CRANBERRY JELLY IN A CAN

2. EXPLODING BISCUITS 3. NIPSY DOODLES 4. RAINBOW SPRINKLES 5. TOILET PAPER 6. MONEY I scratched my head again. "I don't see the problem," I said. "I think we have a nice little assortment there." May stamped her foot. "It's stupid, Junie Jones! Stupid, stupid, stupid!" she said. "Who in the world is thankful for toilet paper?" Sheldon raised his hand. "I am!" he said. "My grampa Ned Potts says that toilet paper was one of the greatest inventions in history. Especially after they put that little cardboard rollie thing inside." I nodded. "Yes," I said. "That cardboard rollie thing is a genius. If you put some string through it, it makes a lovely necklace for Mother's Day." José jumped up. "PLUS, if you have two of

them, you can make binoculars!" he said. "I make binoculars and spy on my sister. And they really, really work!" May did a huffy breath at us. "Well, I don't care what you guys say. My mother, Mrs. Mary Murkee, says our list from yesterday is ridiculous. She says children are never thankful for the right stuff. And so that's how come she started a brand- new Thankful List for us." She reached in her pocket and pulled out the list. "My mother says if we use this list, we will win the contest for sure." She unfolded it. "Who wants to hear it? Who wants to hear the brand-new list my mother started?"

No one raised their hand. May read it anyway. OUR THANKFUL LIST BY ROOM ONE NUMBER 1: Room One is thankful for our mothers, who cover us

in blankets of warm, fuzzy love and make our hearts overflow with joy bubbles. NUMBER 2: Room One is thankful for the happy sound of our mothers' laughter as it tinkles through the air and melts like musical snow crystals in our ears. NUMBER 3: Room One is thankful for May. The End. May looked up and grinned. "I added that last one myself. But I think it fits right in," she said. She folded her list up again. And she skipped back to her seat. At first, Room One did not say any words. We just stared at each other with curious eyes. Then finally, Lennie spoke up. "I think we should stick with the Nipsy Doodles," he said. All of the children got relief in our faces. "Yes, yes! Me too! Me too!" we said.