1. Dumb Bunnies and Clucks

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1 Dumb Bunnies and Clucks Monday Dear first-grade journal, Dumb bunny! Dumb bunny! Dumb bunny! I am not allowed to say dumb bunny! On account of my teacher heard me call May that name on the playground. And

he said for me to knock it off. Only here is something I just thought of. Even if I can't say dumb bunny out loud, I can still think it inside my head. 'Cause heads are silent. Which is what I like about heads. I am going to try it out right now. I put down my pencil and looked at May. Then I squinted my eyes real teensy. And I thought that name to just myself. Dumb bunny! Dumb bunny! Dumb bunny! Dumb bunny! May looked suspicious at me. "What are you doing, Junie Jones? Why are you squinting like that?" she asked. "Stop it right now. Stop that squinting. I paused my squint.

"I'm not just squinting at you, May. I'm also thinking a name about you inside my head. But you don't even know what name I'm thinking. 'Cause heads are silent. Which is what I like about heads," I said. May frowned. I started my squint again. Dumb bunny, dumb bunny, dumb bunny, dumb bunny, dumb bunny, I thought. After I finished, I brushed my hands together very satisfied. "There. That ought to hold me for a while," I said. May kept on frowning. Then BLAM! She exploded out of her chair! And she zoomed to the front of the room! "Mr. Scary! Mr. Scary! Junie B. called me that name again! I know she did! Only she thought it inside her head! And that is just plain sneaky!"

Mr. Scary was writing at his desk. He closed his eyes and did a big breath. "May, what are our three new rules about tattling?" he asked. "You and I came up with three new rules to control your tattling, remember? Can you tell me what they are, please?" May stood there a real long time. She did not like the three new rules, I believe. Finally, she started to say them. "Rule number one: Count to twenty before I tattle," she grumped. Mr. Scary nodded. "Yes, May. Excellent. That's the first rule. Go on." "Rule number two," said May. "If I still feel like tattling, count to twenty again." Mr. Scary did a thumbs-up. "Yes, good … and rule number three?" May sucked in her cheeks. "Rule number three: If I still feel like

tattling after that go home eat dinner go to bed wake up eat breakfast come back to school raise my hand to tattle then put my hand over my mouth and please be quiet," she said. Mr. Scary clapped his happy hands. "Perfect! You've got it! Those are exactly the rules we talked about, aren't they?" he said. "I'm very proud of you for remembering them!" He stood up and walked her back to her chair. "You have a great memory for rules, May," he said. "But the next step is to actually follow the rules, okay? And I don't believe you counted to twenty this time, did you?" I leaned over and tapped on him. "I can vouch for that," I said. "There was definitely no counting." Mr. Scary frowned at me. "I'll deal with you in a minute, Miss Jones,"