6. Full of Soup

6 Full of Soup That night, Daddy tucked me into bed. He said that Paulie Allen Puffer's brother is full of soup. "There's no such thing as a tooth witch, Junie B.," he said. "I promise you there isn't. Paulie Allen Puffer's brother just made that up to scare Paulie Allen. And then Paulie Allen said it to scare you, too." I shook my head. "No, Daddy. No. It's not made up. I know it isn't. 'Cause the tooth

witch makes sense, that's why," I said. "She makes way more sense than a fairy." Daddy raised his eyebrows. "Why?" he asked. "Why does a witch make more sense than a fairy?" "Because," I said. "Because the tooth witch likes to chomp the teeth. But the tooth fairy doesn't do anything with the teeth at all, right? And so why would she even pay money for them?" Daddy did a little frown. "Well, I don't know, exactly," he said. "But I'm sure that she must do something with the teeth, Junie B. There are other things to do with teeth besides just chomping them, you know." "Like what?" I asked. Daddy put his head in his hands. Then he thought and thought and thought.

After he got done thinking, he went to get Mother. She came into my room carrying fussy Ollie. She handed him to Daddy and sat down on my bed. "Daddy said you have another problem about the tooth fairy," she said. I nodded. "Yes," I said. "'Cause if there's really a fairy, then she has to have a reason to want the teeth. Right, Mother? She wouldn't just throw them in the garbage. 'Cause that doesn't make any sense. Plus also, it would hurt my feelings."

Mother hugged me. "No, Junie B. Of course she doesn't throw them in the garbage," she said. "I'm sure the fairy does something very special with the teeth." "Like what?" I said. Mother ran her tired fingers through her hair. She stood up and walked back and forth on my rug. Then, all of a sudden, her face got brighter. "I know. I bet the fairy uses the teeth to make jewelry," she said. At first, Daddy and I didn't say any words. We just stared and stared at that woman.

"Jewelry?" I said finally. Mother smiled. "Yes, of course," she said. "She probably uses the teeth to make little tooth necklaces and bracelets and cute little toe rings. How does that sound?" I made a sick face. "It sounds repulsive," said Daddy. Mother stopped smiling. She quick took Ollie back from Daddy. And she hurried out of my room. After she left, Daddy finished tucking me in bed. "I'm sorry about that, Junie B.," he said. "I'm afraid Ollie has your mother worn to a frazzle these days. But I'm sure she's not right about that jewelry thing." He did a little shiver. "No. Certainly she's not," he said. Then—before I could ask any more

questions about the fairy—he kissed me good night. And he rushed out of my room as fast as Mother. That night, I did not put my tooth under my pillow. Also, I did not put it under there the night after that. Or the night after that. Because what do you know… The fairy still did not make sense.