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frogs. I'm really squeamish when it comes to that sort of thing, so I just let Bethany do the dissecting while I stand on the other side of the room trying not to throw up. Seriously, though, in this day and age I don't know why we're still cutting open frogs to see what's inside them. If somebody tells me there's a heart and intestines inside a frog, I am willing to take their word for it. I was pretty happy I got paired up with Bethany as lab partners. I remember back in elementary school, whenever a teacher picked a boy and a girl to do something together, all the other kids would go crazy.

青蛙。 我碰到这种事就特别犯恶心，所以都是让贝珊妮来解剖，我站在房间另一头忍着不吐。 说真的，都这个年代了，我不明白为什么我们还要切开青蛙看里面有什么。 要是有人告诉我青蛙身体里有心脏和肠子，我百分百相信他。 能和贝珊妮当实验搭档，我可开心了。 我记得上小学的时候，每次老师安排一男一女一起做事，其他小孩都会瞎起哄。

WOULD PETER AND LISA PLEASE CLEAN THE WHITEBOARD? WOO WOOOOO! When I got picked to be lab partners with Bethany, I was hoping for some kind of reaction from the rest of the class. "WOO WOO, RIGHT, GUYS? But I guess everyone's outgrown that stuff. Even though I haven't impressed Bethany with my dissection skills, I still thought I might have a shot her. I don't want to brag or anything, but I HAVE been a pretty hilarious lab partner.

彼得和丽莎麻烦擦一下白板好吗？ 喔——喔喔喔！ 我抽到和贝珊妮当搭档的时候，还盼着班里其他同学会有点反应呢。 “对不对呀大伙？喔喔？” 不过我猜大家都长大了，不再玩那套了。 虽然我的解剖技术没给贝珊妮留下好印象，但我还是觉得我有戏。 我不是吹牛，我当实验搭档真的挺有意思的。

At the end of the day yesterday, I walked up to Bethany when she was getting her coat out of her locker. I admit I was a little nervous talking to her even though we spend forty-five minutes every day as lab partners. But before I got a single word out, I started thinking about frogs. So I don't think it's gonna work out between me and her. Last night when I was telling Uncle Gary about what happened at school, he said my problem is that I'm

昨天下课的时候，我走到正从储物柜拿外套的贝珊妮身边。 我承认，就算我们每天当四十五分钟实验搭档，跟她说话我还是有点紧张。 结果我一个字都没说出口，脑子里又想起解剖青蛙的事了。 所以我觉得我和她肯定成不了。 昨晚我跟加里叔叔说学校这事，他说我的问题是

trying to do this on my own and I need a "wingman" to help me look good in front of the girls so it's easier to ask one out. Well, I think Rowley would be a PERFECT wingman for me, because he makes me look good just by being himself. Today I asked Rowley to be my wingman, but he didn't really understand the concept. So I told him it's just like being my campaign manager, but for the dance. Rowley said maybe we could be EACH OTHER's wingman and help each other get a date to the dance, but I said we should do this one person at a time. I

什么事都想自己来，我需要个“僚机”帮我在女生面前撑场面，这样约人也更容易。 要我说，罗利就是我完美的僚机，因为他只要做自己，就能衬托得我特别好。 今天我跟罗利说让他当我僚机，他没太搞懂这是什么意思。 所以我跟他解释，就好比是我的舞会助选经理。 罗利说我们可以当彼此的僚机，互相帮对方约舞伴，但我说得一个一个来。 我

feel like we need to get my situation taken care of first, because getting Rowley a date to the dance could end up being a long– term project. We gave the wingman things a trial run at lunch, but I think there's still a lot of room for improvement. Thursday On the Walk Home from School Today, Rowley told me he heard from a girl on The Dance Committee that Alyssa Grove just broke up with her boyfriend and is looking for a date to the dance. See, that's EXACTLY why I made Rowley my wingman. Alyssa is one of the most popular girls in my school, so I was gonna have to act quick before one of the other Goobers my class got to her.

觉得得先把我的事搞定，因为帮罗利约舞伴搞不好是个长期项目。 午饭的时候我们试了试，我觉得还有很大的进步空间。 星期四 今天放学走路回家，罗利跟我说，他听舞会委员会的女生说，艾莉莎·格罗夫刚和男朋友分手，正找舞伴。 你看，这就是我选罗利当僚机的原因呀！ 艾莉莎是我们学校最受欢迎的女生之一，我得赶紧行动，不然班里其他呆子就抢先了。

When I got home I called Alyssa's number right away, but no one was there. The answering machine picked up really fast, and the next thing I knew I was leaving a message. UM... YES... THIS IS GREG HEFFLEY SH AIG ANG REGARDING, UM... I hit the "pound" key on the phone so I could delete my message and start over. But my second message wasn't that great, either. HELLO, THIS IS GREG HEFFLEY SPEAKING, AND I'M TRYING TO REACH MELISSA TO SEE IF SHE WOULD BE INTERESTED IN... DANG IT! I must've recorded twenty messages, because I wanted to get it just right. But Rowley was in the room with me trying to stay completely silent, and

我一到家就立刻给艾莉莎打电话，可是没人接。 答录机很快就接了，我不知不觉就开始留言了。 嗯…… 那个…… 我是格雷·赫弗利，那个，关于……嗯…… 我按了电话的井号键，想删掉留言重新说。 可是我的第二条留言说得也不怎么样。 喂，我是格雷·赫弗利，我找梅利莎，想问她有没有兴趣……该死！ 我前前后后录了二十条留言，就想录得完美一点。 当时罗利就在我房间里，一直拼命保持安静，然后