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came into the gym today to lecture the boy's. He said this was no laughing matter and that anyone caught pantsing another student would be suspended. But Vice Principal Roy should have watched where he was standing, because some kid snuck under the bleachers and got him pretty good. Whoever did it Escaped before Vice Principal Roy could catch him. No one knows for sure who it was, but the name there using for the guy is the Mad Pantser. Tuesday

今天他来体育馆给男孩子们训话。 他说这事可不是闹着玩的，谁扒同学裤子被抓住就要被停学。 可罗伊副校长没留心自己站的位置，有个小孩溜到看台底下，把他裤子扒得够呛。 不管是谁，在罗伊副校长抓住他之前就跑掉了。 没人确定到底是谁干的，大家都管这家伙叫‘疯扒裤狂’。 星期二

It's been about a week since they introduced these Candy Grams, and I am getting a little concerned that I haven't gotten one yet. I've never flung potatoes on the ceiling and I've never pantsed anyone in my life, so I don't know what a guy needs to do to impress a girl these days. It seems like every guy in my homeroom has gotten a Candy Gram. Even Travis Hickey got one, and he'll eat a crust of pizza out of a trash can if you give him a quarter. Uncle Gary was playing his computer game in my room the other night, and I told him about the Valentine's Day dance And the Candy Grams. Believe it or not, gave me some really good advice. Uncle Gary told me the best way to get a girl's attention is by making yourself look "unavailable". He

学校推出糖果贺卡已经快一周了，我一块都没收到，有点犯愁。 我从来没往天花板扔过土豆，这辈子也没扒过别人裤子，真不知道现在要怎么做才能讨女孩喜欢。 好像我班每个男生都收到糖果贺卡了。 就连特拉维斯·希基都收到了，只要给二十五美分，他就能从垃圾桶里捡披萨边吃。 前几天晚上加里叔叔在我房间打游戏，我跟他说了情人节舞会和糖果贺卡的事。 信不信由你，他给了我一条特别棒的建议。 加里叔叔说，吸引女孩注意的最好办法，就是让自己看起来‘不缺人追’。 他

said what I should do Is Buy a Bunch of Candy Grams and have them all delivered to myself so the girls would think I was a really hot property. I Probably Should Have Thought about Talking to Uncle Gary a lot earlier. He's been married something like four times already, so he's an EXPERT on relationships. Yesterday I bought two dollar's worth of Candy Grams, and today in homeroom they were delivered to me. HERE'S ANOTHER ONE FOR GREG HEFFLEY! I just hope this works, because that two bucks was my lunch money.

说我该买一大堆糖果贺卡，全都寄给我自己，这样女孩们就会觉得我特别受欢迎。 我真该早一点想到去找加里叔叔讨主意。 他都结过四次婚了，绝对是恋爱关系专家。 昨天我买了两美元的糖果贺卡，今天班会课就送到我手上了。 又有一张给格雷格·赫夫利！ 我只希望这招有用，毕竟这两美元可是我的午饭钱。

Friday By Wednesday I'd blown through five dollars, and I realised if I kept buying Candy Grams for myself, I was gonna starve to death. So I decided to actually buy a Candy Gram for a girl and see how that went. Yesterday at lunch I bought a Candy Gram and sent it to Adrianne Simpson, who sits three rows away from me in English. But I didn't want to risk my whole quarter on one person, so I made sure I got my money's worth. Dear Adrianne, It would be "sweet" if you'd go with me to the Valentine's Day dance! Signed, Sheg Neffley P.S. If the answer is no, please hand seats who is two this to Julia Barros Adrianne and Julia were both giving me dirty looks when I walked into class today, so I'm assuming it's

星期五 到周三我就花光了五美元，我意识到要是一直给自己买糖果贺卡，我会饿死的。 所以我决定真的给一个女孩买一张，看看结果如何。 昨天午饭时我买了一张糖果贺卡，寄给了阿德琳·辛普森，英语课上她坐我前三排。 但我不想把整整二十五美分都砸在一个人身上，所以我得物尽其用。 亲爱的阿德琳：如果你愿意和我一起去情人节舞会，那就太‘甜’了！ 落款：谢格·内夫利 附言 如果答案是不行，请把它转给朱莉亚·巴罗斯 今天我进教室的时候，阿德琳和朱莉亚都对我翻白眼，所以我猜

a no from both of them. I realised a Candy Gram isn't the ONLY way to ask a girl to a dance, though. There's a girl named Leighann Marlow who sits in the same chair for homeroom That I Sit in for History class. So I wrote her a note on my desk, and it didn't cost me a cent. Unfortunately, I forgot that after-school detention is held in the same room As History, so some moron jumped in with an answer before Leighann even had a chance to read my note. Hi, leanne, if you are looking for someone to go to the dance with, just let me know by writing back. Greg Heffley Dear Greg Yes I will go to the dance with you and P.S. will you marry me? HAR HAR HAR Hi Greg I am sorry But I'm not interested in going to the dance with you. Leighann I'm pretty nervous, because it seems like there aren't really a lot of girls left to choose from at this point. One girl who doesn't have a date yet is Erika Hernandez. She just broke up with her boyfriend,

她们两个都拒绝我了。 不过我想明白了，邀请女孩去舞会，糖果贺卡不是唯一的办法。 有个叫莉安·马洛的女孩，她班会课坐的椅子，就是我历史课坐的那把。 所以我在桌面上给她写了便条，一分钱都没花。 倒霉的是，我忘了课后留校也在历史教室，所以莉安还没来得及看我的便条，就有个蠢货抢先回了信。 嗨，莉安，如果你想找舞伴，就写回信告诉我。 格雷格·赫夫利 亲爱的格雷格 我愿意和你去跳舞 附言：你愿意娶我吗？ 哈哈哈哈 嗨格雷格 对不起 但我不想和你去舞会。 莉安 我现在挺慌的，因为到这个地步没剩下几个女孩可以选了 还没找到舞伴的女孩，有一位是埃丽卡·埃尔南德斯 她刚和男朋友分手

this kid named Jamar Law, who is famous in our school for getting his head stuck in a chair. The janitor even had to cut him free with a hacksaw. It's in the year book and everything. Erika is really pretty and nice, so don't ask me what she was thinking when she started going out with a doofus like Jamar. She would be at the top of my list for the dance. But I'm worried that if things work out between me and her, I'd always be thinking about her ex-boyfriend and I wouldn't be able to get past it.

就是那个叫贾马尔·劳的男孩，他在学校出名是因为脑袋被椅子卡住了。 最后校工只好用钢锯锯开椅子才把他救出来。 这事都登到校年鉴里了。 埃丽卡又漂亮又温柔，别问我她怎么会看上贾马尔这种笨蛋。 她在我的舞伴候选人名单里排第一位。 但我担心要是我和她成了，我总会想起她的前男友，心里过不去这个坎。