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remembering multiplication facts. But they seriously slow me down. EIGHT TIMES FOUR IS THIRTY-TWO, THIRTY-TWO, THIRTY-TWO! EIGHT TIMES FOUR IS THIRTY-TWO, AND NOW YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE! Earlier this year we had a math teacher named Mr. Sparks who used to stand on his chair every time he wanted us to remember something important. But once when Mr. Sparks was trying to get us to remember a math concept, one of the legs on his

chair broke and he fell. Mr. Sparks broke his collarbone, and I heard he's suing the school over it. I don't remember the concept he was trying to teach us that day, but I do always remember never to stand on the furniture. During recess today everyone was just waiting to go back inside, but then Rowley got up and started skipping around the playground.

A few people started cheering and clapping. They must've thought Rowley was protesting all the new rules by skipping instead of running, but the truth is, skipping is just something Rowley likes to do. For some reason it really gets on my nerves when Rowley skips, so it bugged me to see him prancing around the playground like that. Skipping is actually a real sore subject between the two of us. Rowley says I'm jealous of him because I don't know how to skip, but I think it just looks stupid. I will admit that I never exactly got the hang of

skipping. In fact, I was the only kid in first grade who couldn't do it. I was afraid I'd be held back until I learned how to skip, but luckily they let me move on to second grade. Still, I'm worried it's gonna come back to haunt me later on. GREG HEFFLEY WILL NOT BE RECEIVING HIS DIPLOMA DUE TO AN INABILITY TO SKIP. Sometimes I wonder how me and Rowley ended up

being friends in the first place, since we're so different. But at this point I figure we're stuck with each other, so I just try to overlook the things he does that annoy me. Thursday The thing that stinks about having Santa's Scout watching my every move at home is that I can't get away with the things I used to do during the holidays. A few years ago Mom and Dad put some gifts under the tree a week before Christmas, and it was driving me crazy not knowing what they were. One of the gifts had my name on it, and I was pretty sure it was a video game. I made a tiny little tear in

the wrapping paper to see, and sure enough, it was a game I'd asked for. But then it was bugging me that a game I wanted was sitting right there under the tree and I couldn't play it. So I went one step further and made a slit along the top of the packaging and slid the box out. I opened the plastic case and removed the game, then put the box back in the wrapping paper and taped it closed. But I started to get paranoid that Mom was gonna pick up the present and notice it felt lighter, so I opened it back up and put one of Rodrick's heavy metal CDs inside the box to make it the same weight it was before.