小屁孩日记 · 06 Cabin Fever

13

The Neighborhood drumm's pricing scam tor reporters have uncovered a price gouging scheme at the school holiday bazaar that has been running unchecked for years. The popular chicken drumstick drummies have been sold at the bazaar for more than six times their retail value. I'm outraged, said a loyal customer who did not want to be see drummies new bazaar offers alternative to school event with a community reeling from the drumm scandal, two boys have decided to make things right. We've decided to start our own holiday bazaar, said greg heffley, an entrepreneur, see bazaar section a three. We realized we were gonna have to come up with some more pages for people to take our newspaper seriously, so we started brainstorming ideas for other sections we could add. I figured we needed a comics section, so we started there.

T.G.I.F. Hey you! Why are you running around in your underwear? It's Friday! Stinky Sebastian by Greg Heffley OK, WHO FORGOT TO WEAR DEODORANT? Ned the Napkin by Rowley Jefferson Can you clean up my spilled soda, Ned? How come you always ask ME? We added an advice column, where people write in questions about problems they're having. But we didn't have time to wait for people to send in real questions, so we just made a few up.

Ask greg Dear Greg. My wife is always criticizing everything I do. The other day it was a little chilly out so I wore socks with my sandals. My actually made me go back inside and put on shoes! I feel like she treats me like a child, but she has a very strong personality and I'm afraid to stand up to her. What can I do? Sincerely, FRUSTRATED Dear FRUSTRATED, It's NEVER okay to wear socks with sandals! You should apologize to your wife immediately. Greg Dear Greg Are you single? Sincerely, THE LADIES Dear THE LADIES, Why, yes, I am! Greg Rowley was all excited about this newspaper, and he said he wanted to be like a real reporter and go out looking for stories. So I told him he should go around the neighborhood and see if he could dig up any dirt. But what Rowley came back with wasn't exactly hard- hitting news. Kitten has a fun day By ROWLEY JEFFERSON Yesterday Mrs. Salter's kitten Mittens was seen frolicking in her front yard. Mittens spent an hour and a half chasing after a butterfly that was flying around Mrs. Salter's azaleas, and when the butterfly flew off, Mittens got very interested in something that was jumping near the front porch. But by the time I got close enough to see what Mittens was chasing, the thing had hopped away.

I decided to make myself editor in chief so I could control the kinds of things we had in our newspaper. Because if Rowley had his way, our paper would be like a little girl's coloring book. Mom told us we should go to some businesses downtown and see if anyone was willing to pay for ads to cover the cost of our first printing. The only person who was willing to buy an ad in our paper was Tony from Papa Tony's Pizza, and I'm pretty sure the reason he agreed to help is because we're in there at least twice a week and he didn't want to lose our business. Tony gave us just enough money to buy some color ink cartridges, so we printed a hundred copies.

Monday Yesterday we went around town trying to sell our papers, but nobody wanted to pay and we had to start giving them out for free. When we handed a paper to Tony, he didn't seem too happy that his ad was running next to a negative review of his restaurant. I told him if he bought a BIGGER ad for the NEXT edition of the paper, we could arrange for a more positive write-up. We still had a few dozen papers left, and since we were handing them out for free, I figured I could unload them at school.

But when I started giving them to kids as they walked in the door, Vice Principal Roy asked me what I was doing. He said I couldn't hand out an "unauthorized publication" on school grounds and that he was going to have to confiscate my papers. But I knew what this was REALLY all about. Vice Principal Roy was just spooked that we were gonna give the school a run for its money with our Holiday Bazaar. I was still pretty mad about the whole thing when I got home this afternoon, and I decided I wasn't gonna just roll over and let Vice Principal Roy shut us down. Even though Vice Principal Roy took our papers, I figured I could make some signs and hang them up around town to advertise.

微信扫码阅读完整绘本
QR Code