5

I put the deodorant on my dresser, but I tossed the book in the trash. I'd seen that one before. Mom must've gotten the same book for Rodrick when he was my age, and I found it in his junk drawer. And believe me, I do not need to see the pictures in that book a second time. And what's worse is that Mom made me the subject

我把除臭剂放在梳妆台上，但我把书扔进了垃圾桶。 我以前见过这个。罗德里克像我这么大的时候妈妈肯定也给他买过同样的书，我在他的杂物抽屉里找到的。 相信我，我不需要再看那本书里的照片了。 更糟糕的是，妈妈把我当成了靶子

of her parenting column in our local paper that week. She didn't use my actual name, but I don't think it would've taken a detective to figure out who she was talking about. Puberty can be a difficult time When a child begins to experience the changes that come with adolescence, the transformation can be uncomfortable, awkward, or even frightening. But given the right guidance, a child can learn to welcome, and even celebrate, the transition into adulthood. My second-born son recently began his wondrous journey into his new Sunday Tonight Mom called a "house meeting." And whenever she does that, it's never good. The last time we had a house meeting, it was so she could complain about the situation in the bathroom. She said she was tired of having to clean the floor around the toilet because of our "lousy aim."

她那周在当地报纸上的育儿专栏。 她没有用我的真名，但我觉得一个警探也不会知道她说的是谁。 当一个孩子开始经历青春期带来的变化时，这种变化可能会让人不舒服、尴尬，甚至害怕。 但在正确的指导下，孩子可以学会欢迎，甚至庆祝，向成年的过渡。 我的二儿子最近开始了他奇妙的旅程，进入了他新的“周日今夜”，妈妈叫他“家庭会议”。 每次她这么做，都不好。 上次我们开家庭会议，就是为了让她抱怨浴室里的情况。 她说她已经厌倦了打扫厕所周围的地板，因为我们的“糟糕的瞄准”。

I knew exactly what she was talking about, too. One time I actually missed the bus because I used the bathroom after Manny. All I can say is, I'm not the one causing the problem. When Rodrick uses the bathroom, half the time he doesn't even turn on the light. Mom said the new rule was that us boys were gonna have to sit down every time we used the bathroom, no matter what. But none of us guys liked THAT idea. Rodrick suggested we just buy a couple of urinals, since there are more of US than there are of HER. Plus,

我也很清楚她在说什么。 有一次我误车了因为我在曼尼之后用了厕所。 我只能说，问题不是我造成的。 罗德里克上厕所的时候，有一半时间他连灯都不开。 妈妈说新规定是我们男生每次上厕所都得坐下，不管发生什么。 但我们都不喜欢这个主意。 罗德里克建议我们买几个小便池，因为美国人比她人多。 另外,

that way, more than one person could go at the same time. But Mom said that would be "tacky," and she used her veto power to shut his idea down. I thought tonight's house meeting was gonna be a follow-up to the bathroom meeting, since nobody was following the sitting-down rule and things are worse than ever. But this meeting was about something completely different. Mom told us that she was going back to school and that she was gonna start taking classes a few times a week. Well, I was totally caught off guard by this news.

那样的话，不止一个人可以同时去。 但妈妈说那太“俗气”了，于是她用否决权否决了他的想法。 我以为今晚的家庭会议是厕所会议的后续会议，因为没人遵守坐下来的规定而且情况比以前更糟了。 但这次会面的内容完全不同。 妈妈告诉我们她要回学校了，她要开始每周上几次课。 这个消息让我完全措手不及。

Mom's ALWAYS there when I get home from school, and that's the way I like it. But Mom said that after all these years of staying at home with us kids, she needs to do something that stimulates her mind. So she said she's gonna take classes for a semester and see how it goes. I guess I can understand why Mom would want to branch out, because if I did the kinds of things she does every day, I'd probably be going bananas, too.

当我从学校回家时，妈妈总是在那里，这是我喜欢的方式。 但是妈妈说，在家里和我们这些孩子呆了这么多年之后，她需要做点刺激她思维的事情。 所以她说她要上一学期的课，看看效果如何。 我想我能理解为什么妈妈想要扩展，因为如果我做她每天做的那些事情，我可能也会发疯的。

Mom said us men are gonna have to make our own dinners a few nights a week and start doing chores that she usually takes care of herself. One of those chores is making lunches, and to be honest with you, I'm pretty happy that one is getting turned over to us. Mom writes a note on our lunch bags every day, and I can definitely live without THAT.

妈妈说我们男人每周得有几个晚上自己做饭然后开始做一些她通常自己做的家务。 其中一项家务是做午餐，老实说，我很高兴把一件事交给我们。 妈妈每天都会在我们的午餐袋上写一张纸条，我绝对可以没有它。