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SILLY BEAR YAWNING, SILLY BEAR SAD. SILLY BEAR SLEEPING, SILLY BEAR GLAD! THE END. I told Mom what I thought of Manny's books, and she said that if they were so easy to write, then I should try writing one myself. So that's exactly what I did. Trust me, it wasn't hard, either. All you have to do is make up a character with a snappy name, and then make sure the character learns a lesson at the end of the book. Now all I need to do is mail this thing off to a publisher and wait for the money to start rolling in.

傻熊打哈欠，傻熊伤心。 傻熊睡着了，傻熊高兴了！最后。 我告诉妈妈我对曼尼的书的看法，她说如果它们这么容易写，那我也应该试着自己写一本。 我就是这么做的。 相信我，这也不难。 你所要做的就是给角色起个好听的名字，然后确保这个角色在书的最后得到教训。 现在我要做的就是把这本书寄给出版商然后等着财源滚滚而来。

Wise Up, Mr. Shropsharp! by Greg Heffley Once upon a time there was this man named Mr. Shropsharp who thought all these crazy thoughts. I DON'T KNOW MUCH, BUT I DO KNOW ONE THING: POLAR BEARS ARE SOME USELESS ANIMALS.

聪明点，夏普先生！从前有一个人，名叫施罗普夏普先生，他有很多疯狂的想法。 我知道的不多，但我知道一件事：北极熊是一些无用的动物。

One day Mr. Shropsharp took a ride in his car. HERE I GO. But then... OOPS.

一天，什罗普夏普先生开着他的车去兜风。 我走了。但后来…哦。

MR. SHROPSHARP, YOU WOULD HAVE DROWNED. BUT LUCKILY TOBUK HERE WAS SITTING ON AN ICEBERG, AND HE SAVED YOUR LIFE. BEFORE, I SAID THAT POLAR BEARS ARE SOME USELESS ANIMALS, BUT NOW I CAN SEE THAT NOT EVERY POLAR BEAR IS SO USELESS AFTER ALL. THE END See what I mean? The only thing I noticed after I finished the book was that I forgot to make it rhyme. But the publisher is gonna have to pay me extra if they want that.

什罗普夏普先生，你会淹死的。 但幸运的是，托巴克正坐在冰山上，他救了你的命。 以前，我说北极熊是一些无用的动物，但现在我明白了，并不是所有的北极熊都那么无用。 明白我的意思了吗？读完这本书后，我唯一注意到的是我忘了押韵。 但如果出版商想要的话，他们得付我额外的钱。

Saturday Well, after spending the last two weeks walking to school, I was really looking forward to kicking back and doing nothing for two days. The problem with watching TV on a Saturday is that the only thing that's on is bowling or golf. Plus, the sun comes through our sliding glass window, and you can barely see the TV screen anyway. Today I wanted to change the channel, but the remote was on top of the coffee table. I was all comfortable, with my bowl of cereal in my lap, so I really didn't want to get up. I tried using the Force to make the remote levitate

嗯，在过去的两个星期步行去学校之后，我真的很期待放松一下，什么也不做两天。 周六看电视的问题在于，电视上只有保龄球或高尔夫。 另外，阳光从我们的滑动玻璃窗射进来，你几乎看不到电视屏幕。 今天我想换台，但遥控器在咖啡桌上。 我很舒服，腿上放着一碗麦片，所以我真的不想起来。 我试过用原力让遥控器悬浮起来

to me, even though I've tried it a million times before and it's never worked once. Today I tried for about fifteen minutes and concentrated really hard, but no luck. I just wish I'd known that Dad was standing right behind me the whole time. Dad told me I was gonna have to go outside and get some exercise. I told Dad I exercise all the time and just this morning I used the bench press he got me. But I should have come up with something more believable, because it was pretty obvious that wasn't true.

对我来说，尽管我已经试过无数次了，但一次都没用。 今天我试了大约15分钟，并且非常努力地集中注意力，但是运气不好。 我只是希望我知道爸爸一直都站在我身后。 爸爸跟我说我得出去锻炼一下。 我告诉爸爸我一直在锻炼，就在今天早上，我用了他给我的卧推机。 但我应该想出一些更可信的东西，因为很明显这不是真的。