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movies and then draw pictures afterward to show how the movies affected them. But it was really just an excuse for Rodrick and his friends to watch a bunch of horror movies on school nights. Rodrick's friends got the movie-watching part done, but they didn't draw a single picture. And the night before the Science Fair, Rodrick didn't have anything to show for himself. So me, Mom, and Dad had to bail Rodrick out. Dad typed up the paper, Mom made the poster board stuff, and I had to draw a bunch of pictures. I did my best to imagine what teenagers would draw after watching violent movies.

The thing that REALLY stinks is that I caught heat from Mom when she saw my drawings, because she said they were "disturbing." And that's why I was only allowed to watch G-rated movies for the rest of the year. But if you want to talk about "disturbing, " you should've seen some of the stuff Manny was coming up with those days. One night, Rodrick accidentally left one of his horror movies in the DVD player, and when Manny went to turn on cartoons the next day, he got Rodrick's movie instead.

I came across a couple of Manny's drawings after that, and some of them were enough to give me nightmares. Tuesday Mom and Dad set up due dates for Rodrick on his

Science Fair project, and by 6:00 tonight, he was supposed to tell them the theme of his experiment. But at 6:45, things weren't looking so good. Rodrick was watching a show about astronauts, and what happens to them after they've been up in space for a long time. The show said that when the astronauts get back to Earth, they're actually TALLER than when they left. And the reason is because there's no gravity in space, so their spines decompress or something. Well, that gave Rodrick the idea he was looking for. Rodrick told Mom and Dad he was going to do his science experiment on the effect of "zero gravity" on the human spine. And from the way Rodrick was talking it up, you'd think the results of his

experiment were gonna benefit mankind. Dad seemed pretty impressed. Or maybe he was just relieved that Rodrick actually came through on his first task. But I think Dad started to see things a little different later on when he told Rodrick to take the trash out to the curb. I CAN'T. I'M DOING MY RESEARCH. Wednesday Yesterday at school, they announced tryouts for the big Winter Talent Show.

As soon as I found out about it, I came up with this AWESOME idea for a comedy skit that me and Rowley could do. But I admit the REAL reason I wrote it was to give myself an excuse to talk to Holly Hills, who is Heather Hills's sister and the most popular girl in my grade. The Boy Whose Family Thinks He's a DOG LOOK, HONEY! OUR DOG IS STANDING ON ITS HIND LEGS! I Am A PERSON NOT A DOG