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They also have a massage therapist on staff to help kids reduce their stress, and a room with napping pods for when students need a break. Their assemblies are pretty top-shelf, too. In the last year they had a Formula One driver and a team of astronauts who are headed to Mars, which kind of makes Randy's Reptile Revue seem a little cheesy by comparison.

学校还配有专职按摩师帮孩子减压，还留出房间放了午休舱，供学生需要休息的时候使用 他们的全校集会也办得特别棒 去年他们请来一位F1赛车手，还有一队要前往火星的宇航员，这么一比，兰迪的爬宠展示就显得有点俗套了

So if you end up getting sent to Fulson Tech, you're all set. It's the OTHER place everyone's worried about, which is Slacksville Middle School. Slacksville's building is older than ours, and it doesn't have air-conditioning. They can't even open their windows to get some fresh air when the weather's warm because the middle school is right next to the state dump. PANT, PANT! MOP MOP FAN FAN It's not just the students who are worried about what's going to happen to them. It's the teachers, too. They know that if the school closes, they could lose their jobs.

所以如果你最后被分到福尔森科技中学，那你可太舒服了 大家真正担心的是另一所学校，也就是斯莱克斯维尔中学 斯莱克斯维尔的教学楼比我们的旧，还没有空调 天热的时候他们连开窗透透气都做不到，因为这所中学紧挨着州立垃圾场 呼哧！呼哧！ 拖拖拖！扇扇扇！ 不光学生在担心自己未来的处境 老师们也一样发愁 他们知道要是学校关闭，他们就会丢掉工作

So at this point, Ms. Pritchard has given up on teaching Geometry completely because she's trying to plan for her future. The rest of the staff has started looking, too. Our newest janitor even posted something on the bulletin board to see if he can get work if this whole thing blows up. AVAILABLE FOR ODD JOBS. housecleaning, small motor repair, dog walking.

所以到现在，普里查德老师已经彻底放弃教几何了，她一直在为自己的将来做打算 其他教职工也都开始找新工作了 我们新来的清洁工还在公告板发了广告，看看万一学校黄了他能不能接活：可接零活 家居清洁、小型电机维修、遛狗

Thursday I got some seriously good news yesterday. The student paper found out which kids are going where if the school closes, and they posted the list on the bulletin board in the main entrance. And I'm happy to say that if we get shut down, I'm headed to Fulson Tech. I thought the way the school would split us up would be by sending kids whose last names started with A-M to one place and the kids whose last names started with N-Z to the other. But I guess they wanted to be fair, so they did it by alternating between names.

周四 我昨天得到了一个天大的好消息 校报查到了学校关闭后大家的去向，还把名单贴在了正门的公告板上 我很高兴地说，要是我们学校真关了，我会去福尔森科技中学 我本来以为学校会按姓氏首字母拆分，A-M去一所，N-Z去另一所 不过他们想做得更公平，所以就按名字轮流分配了

That's lucky for me, but not so lucky for Jenna Healy and Alfonso Hendricks. Healy, Jenna - Slacksville Heffley, Greg - Fulson Tech Hendricks, Alfonso - Slacksville Unfortunately, Rowley's name didn't fall in the right spot, which means he'll be going to Slacksville. And even though I told him I'd bring home leftover prime rib from the Fulson Tech cafeteria every day, it didn't seem to cheer him up any. Rowley's all stressed out, and so are half the other kids at my school. Their only hope at this point is that the school does well on the standardized test and the state doesn't shut us down.

这对我来说太走运，可对珍娜·希利和阿方索·亨德里克斯就不是了 希利，珍娜——斯莱克斯维尔 赫夫利，格雷格——福尔森科技 亨德里克斯，阿方索——斯莱克斯维尔 不幸的是，罗利的名字没排对，意味着他要去斯莱克斯维尔 哪怕我跟他说我每天都会从福尔森科技食堂带剩的肋排回家给他，也没让他开心起来 罗利压力超大，我们学校一半的孩子都和他一样焦虑 他们现在唯一的希望就是我们学校标准化考试考得好，州政府就不会关闭我们学校了

A few kids" parents even hired private tutors to help them study, and Rowley's parents got him a different tutor for every single subject. And that stinks for me, because it means he doesn't have any free time to hang out after school. I think Rowley's parents went a little overboard with this tutoring stuff, though. They even got him a Phys Ed tutor, and I'm pretty sure none of that stuff is gonna be on the test. TWEET

有几个孩子的家长甚至雇了私教帮孩子复习，罗利的家长给他每门课都请了不同的家教 这可苦了我了，因为他放学之后再也没空陪我玩了 不过我觉得罗利的爸妈在请家教这件事上有点太过头了 他们居然还给罗利请了体育家教，我敢肯定考试根本不考这些内容 嘀