4

The second I saw that thing I knew what it was, because I'd seen the ads in one of Mom's parenting magazines. THE VAULT END SCREEN TIME DEBATES FOR GOOD! 6:00 FITS PHONES AND MOST TABLETS! BULLETPROOF GLASS 3 TO MINUTES TO 10 MINUTES TO 10 YEARS! Mom set the timer for two hours, then went back to her seat in the front. Whoever made that thing knew what they were doing, because me and Rodrick couldn't figure out how to crack it. 40

我一看到那东西就认出它了，因为我在妈妈的一本育儿杂志上见过它的广告 「电子保管盒」一劳永逸终结屏幕时间争吵！ 兼容6英寸手机和大多数平板电脑！ 防弹玻璃设计，锁定时长从3分钟到10分钟，最长可达十年！ 妈妈设了两小时的定时，然后走回前排的座位 发明这东西的人太懂我们了，我和罗德里克根本没办法把它撬开 40

Mom handed us some activities she'd created for the trip and said they should keep us busy for a while. But it wasn't that much fun playing Wildlife Bingo when we couldn't even identify half the animals we saw along the side of the road. After another hour or two of driving, Mom and Dad started looking for places to stop. 41

妈妈给我们拿来了她为旅行准备的一些活动，说这些能让我们好一阵子都不无聊 但玩野生生物宾果一点都不好玩，我们连路边看到的一半动物都认不出来 又开了一两个小时之后，爸爸妈妈开始找地方停车休息 41

There were some signs for "scenic attractions", so Dad pulled over at the exit for a place called Culpepper's Ravine. Mom got all excited because she said we were like explorers who were about to see something new. But unfortunately some OTHER explorers beat us to it. We couldn't find any parking, so we had to move along. And it was the exact same story for the next three places we tried to stop. 43

路边立着几块「景区」的指示牌，所以爸爸拐出主路，开往一个叫卡尔佩珀峡谷的地方 妈妈特别兴奋，她说我们就像即将发现新事物的探险家 但不幸的是，别的探险家早就比我们先到一步了 我们找不到任何停车位，所以只能继续往前走 接下来我们尝试停靠的三个地方，全都是一模一样的情况 43

I know I should feel lucky to be alive at a time when there's modern medicine and smartwatches and peanut-butter-filled pretzels. But sometimes I wish I was born a little SOONER so I had a chance to actually DISCOVER something. Because when you find something new they NAME it after you. But by now everything worth finding has already been discovered. 43

我知道，活在这个有现代医疗、智能手表还有花生酱夹心扭结饼的时代，我应该觉得幸运 可有时候我真希望自己出生得更早一点，这样我才有机会真正发现点新东西 因为如果你发现了新事物，人们就会用你的名字给它命名 到如今，所有值得发现的东西都已经被人发现完了 43

And you wouldn't really want your name on any of the stuff that's left over. GREG'S DITCH One time the planetarium in our town had a fundraiser, and if you paid ten bucks you'd get a certificate that said a planet in some faraway galaxy was named after you. So Mom paid the ten bucks, and I still have the certificate hanging on the wall in my bedroom. Planet H1-B9932 in the Ursirus Galaxy will hereby be known as PLANET GREG 44

而且你也不会想让自己的名字挂在剩下那些没人要的东西上 格雷格的水沟 有一次我们镇上的天文馆办筹款活动，只要付十美元，就能拿到一张证书，证明遥远星系里有一颗行星用你的名字命名 所以妈妈付了十美元，那张证书现在还挂在我卧室的墙上呢 乌西鲁斯星系的H1-B9932号行星，从今往后正式定名为格雷格行星 44

But when Mom filled out the form I wish she'd put my first AND last name on it. Because now some random Greg could get to my planet before I do and say it's HIS. Dad said our mistake was that we were going to places everyone knew about, and if we got off the main road we might find something SPECIAL. So we took a detour and kept our eyes peeled for anything that looked like it was worth stopping for. 45

但我真希望妈妈填表格的时候，把我的名和姓都写上去 不然搞不好哪个也叫格雷格的陌生人会比我先到那颗行星，说那是他的 爸爸说我们错在去大家都知道的热门地方，如果我们离开主路，说不定能发现特别的东西 所以我们绕了路，睁大眼睛留意任何值得停下看看的东西 45