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Then they teamed up to flip me OVER. I got Manny out of the pool and then spent twenty minutes scrubbing every inch of my body in the outdoor shower. But five seconds after I finished drying off, I was WET again. The kids in the pirate ship figured out that if they plugged TWO cannons, they could get some SERIOUS range.

While I was drying off a SECOND time, we bumped into Mom. And after her morning at the spa, she seemed like a whole new person. She said that while she was getting her massage, she came up with a GREAT idea for how we could spend time as a family. She booked a private cruise for all of us, and she said the boat was gonna be at the dock in half an hour.

That wasn't a lot of time, so we had to split up to track down Dad and Rodrick. I told Mom that Dad was at the gym, so she went there to get him. I found Rodrick exactly where I expected to, and believe me, he owes me for not letting Mom get to him FIRST. We met Mom and Dad down at the dock. Dad wasn't too happy with Mom, because apparently this boat cost a lot of money to rent. But Mom said it was WORTH it, because this cruise was gonna be the highlight of our trip. When I hear the word "cruise," I think of a yacht or at least a souped-up sailboat.

But the boat that Mom rented didn't look like anything special. The boat came with its own captain, so I guess that was SOMETHING. When we got on board, he handed us all life jackets, and after we put them on, we pulled away from the dock. The first thing I noticed was that the boat had a glass bottom, which I was not comfortable with at ALL.

This boat didn't look like it was in such great shape to begin with, so I was worried the glass was gonna crack and we were all gonna sink to the bottom of the ocean. In fact, if I had to guess, I'll bet 50% of all shipwrecks are glass-bottom boats just like the one we were on.

Once we got out on the ocean, the captain asked Mom where she wanted to go. The captain said there were some private islands we could explore, and Mom said we should go to one of THOSE. But it turned out the "private" islands weren't really private, so we didn't bother sticking around. The captain said there was a reef nearby that wasn't usually crowded and we could do some snorkeling. That meant we'd have to go into the actual ocean with all the OTHER stuff swimming around in there, so I wasn't in love with the idea. But nobody else seemed concerned.