小屁孩日记 · 11 Double Down

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But the last straw was when Amanda Pickler did a Book Talk on "The Brain with a Mind of Its Own." Amanda brought in a fake brain made out of Jell-O, but she lost her grip and dropped it on the floor, which made two kids pass out. A bunch of parents aren't happy about the Spineticklers books, either. I heard that Danny McGlurk's dad went to last week's PTA meeting and said he wanted the books banned because they promote WITCHCRAFT.

Apparently, Mr. McGlurk caught Danny dabbling in the "dark arts" in his garage, and Mr. McGlurk blamed it all on the Spineticklers books. But the way I heard it, Danny was just practicing magic tricks for the fall talent show. I seriously hope the Spineticklers books don't get banned, because they're the only thing keeping my reading grade up. Were required to read fifteen books by the end of the year, and ALL of mine are from that series. The way you prove you finished reading a book is by taking a multiple-choice test on the computer.

I've gotten a 100% on every single test I've taken so far, which I guess proves I'm really paying attention when I read the books. QUESTION 12: Who did the Chattering Chompers eat? Mother Father Baby Ellis All of the above When I got home, I told Mom how Mrs. Mott was making us redo our author biographies, and I didn't know what to do. But Mom told me the reason I couldn't find any information on I.M. Spooky is because he's not an actual PERSON. I told Mom that was ridiculous because this guy has written almost 200 books. But Mom said sometimes publishers create a fictional author and then hire a bunch of people to write books under that name.

I gotta say, if that's true I feel kind of cheated. But I feel worse for ROWLEY, because he wasted his time writing I.M. Spooky a letter. Dear Mr. Spooky, First of all let me say I am a huge fan. But the reason I am writing is to complain that the book "Scaredy Cat, and the Haunted House was WAY too scary. Mom was trying to help me find a different author who's an actual human being when there was a knock at our door. I answered it, and there was a lady and some kid I'd never seen before.

I was pretty spooked when she asked if my name was Greg Heffley. That's when I saw the deflated balloon in the kid's hand, and I put two and two together. At first I was kind of excited, because if someone found my BALLOON, that meant I was gonna get that giant jar of candy corn. But then I remembered what I wrote in my letter and wished I could take some of it back. And finally, if you find this balloon and return it to me without delay, I can promise you a large cash reward. I have a rich uncle and I'm sure he'd be happy to hook you up. I didn't want these people thinking I was some weird kid who makes friends by sending out letters attached to helium balloons. But I guess it didn't really matter. I figured I could just take my balloon back and send them on their way.

Before I knew it, though, Mom was at the front door, and she invited them INSIDE. Thirty seconds later we had these two total strangers sitting at our kitchen table. The lady introduced herself as Mrs. Selsam and said her son's name was Maddox. They live in the next town over. Apparently this kid Maddox was practicing the violin in his bedroom and saw the balloon dangling from a tree branch outside.

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