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I went down to Mr. Winsky's office and signed myself up, and I got Rowley to sign up, too. I thought Mr. Winsky would make us do a bunch of chin-ups or jumping jacks or something to prove we were up for the job, but he just handed us our belts and badges on the spot. Mr. Winsky said the openings were for a special

我去了温斯基先生的办公室，自己也签了名，我还让罗利也签了名。 我以为温斯基先生会让我们做一堆引体向上或开合跳之类的来证明我们能胜任这份工作，但他当场就把腰带和徽章递给了我们。 温斯基先生说开幕是为了一个特别节目

assignment. Our school is right next to the elementary school, and they've got a half-day kindergarten there. He wants us to walk the morning session kids home in the middle of the day. I realized that meant we would miss twenty minutes of Pre-Algebra. Rowley must have figured that out, too, because he started to speak up. But I gave him a wicked pinch underneath the desk before he could finish his sentence. I couldn't believe my luck. I was getting instant bully protection and a free pass from half of Pre-Algebra, and I didn't even have to lift a finger. Tuesday Today was our first day as Safety Patrols. Me and Rowley don't technically have stations like all the other Patrols, so that means we don't have to stand out in the freezing cold for an hour before school. But that didn't stop us from coming to the cafeteria for the free hot chocolate they hand out

任务。我们学校就在那所小学旁边，那里有一所半日制幼儿园。 他想让我们在中午送早班的孩子回家。 我意识到这意味着我们将错过20分钟的代数预备课。 罗利肯定也猜到了，因为他开始说了出来。 但在他说完话之前，我在桌子底下狠狠地捏了他一下。 我简直不敢相信我的运气。 我立刻得到了欺凌者的保护还免掉了一半的代数预科课程，我甚至不用动一根手指。 星期二今天是我们安全巡逻的第一天。 严格来说，我和罗利不像其他巡逻队那样有自己的分站，所以我们不用在上学前在寒冷的天气里站一个小时。 但这并没有阻止我们去自助餐厅享用他们分发的免费热巧克力

to the other Patrols before homeroom. Another great perk is that you get to show up ten minutes late for first period. I'm telling you, I've got it made with this Safety Patrol thing. At 12:15, me and Rowley left school and walked the kindergartners home. The whole trip ate up forty-five minutes, and there were only twenty minutes of

到其他巡逻队去上课。 另一个好处是你可以在第一节课晚到十分钟。 我跟你说，我用安全巡逻的东西搞定了。 12点15分，我和罗利离开学校，送幼儿园的孩子们回家。 整个旅程花去了四十五分钟，而只有二十分钟

Pre-Algebra left when we got back. Walking the kids home was no sweat. But one of the kindergartners started to smell a little funny, and I think maybe he had an accident in his pants. He tried to let me know about it, but I just stared straight ahead and kept walking. I'll take these kids home, but believe me, I didn't sign up for any diaper duty. February Wednesday Today it snowed for the first time this winter, and school was canceled. We were supposed to have a test in Pre-Algebra, and I've kind of slacked off ever since I became a Safety Patrol. So I was psyched.

我们回来的时候，预代数课离开了。 送孩子回家一点也不费力。 但有个幼儿园小朋友身上开始有股怪味，我想可能是他的裤子出了意外。 他试图让我知道这件事，但我只是直直地盯着前方，继续往前走。 我会带孩子们回家的，但相信我，我可没报名负责换尿布。 今天下了今冬的第一场雪，学校停课了。 我们本来要考初级代数的，自从我成为安全巡警后我就有点懈怠了。 所以我很兴奋。

I called Rowley and told him to come over. Me and him have been talking about building the world's biggest snowman for the past couple of years now. And when I say the world's biggest snowman, I'm not kidding. Our goal is to get into the "Guinness Book of World Records."

我打电话给罗利，让他过来。 在过去的几年里，我和他一直在谈论建造世界上最大的雪人。 当我说世界上最大的雪人时，我不是在开玩笑。 我们的目标是进入“吉尼斯世界纪录”。

But every time we've gotten serious about going for the record, all the snow has melted, and we've missed our window of opportunity. So this year, I wanted to get started right away. When Rowley came over, we started rolling the first snowball to make the base. I figured the base was going to have to be at least eight feet tall on its own if we wanted to have a shot at breaking the record. But the snowball got real heavy, and we had to take a bunch of breaks in between rolls so we could catch our breath.

但每次我们认真想要打破记录的时候，所有的雪都融化了，我们错过了机会之窗。 所以今年，我想马上开始。 当罗利过来的时候，我们开始滚第一个雪球来做基地。 我想如果我们想要打破记录的话，这个底座本身至少要有8英尺高。 但是雪球变得很沉，我们不得不在滚动之间休息好几次，这样我们才能喘口气。